MfiWV WM MWww'Mf y
"'- yL
COMPOUND EXTRACTy
Ami twnMiiiiMii
Tho Importanco of purifying tlio blood can
not bo overestimated, for without uro blood
you cannot onjoy good health.
At this season nearly every ono needs a
good tncdlclno to purify, vitalize, and enrich
tlio blood, and wo ask you to try Hood's
DomiIIch' Sarsaparllla. Itstrcngthcns
reUUIlai mi builds up tlio system,
creates an appetite, and tones tlio digestion,
whllo it eradicates disease Tlio peculiar
combination, proportion, and preparation
of tlio vegctablo remedies used glvo to
Hood's Barauparllla pcctil- nr-. Ctf
lar curative powers. No u I loci I
other nicdlclno hassuch a record of wonderful
cures. If you liavo mado up your mind to
buy Hood's Sarsaparllla do not bo induced to
tako any other instead. It Is a Peculiar
Medicine, and is worthy your confidence.
nood's Sarsaparllla Is sold by all druggists.
Trcparcd by C I. Hood & Co., Lowell, Mass.
tOO Dosos Ono Dollar
a.
UNION PACIFIC R'WY.
THE OVERLAND ROUTE.
Shortest umt safest route to nil points in
Colorado, Utah, California, Montana, Ida
ho, Oregon ami Washington Territory.
Take the Ovcrliind Fiver and s.t cone d.tv
to nil Pacific coast points. i
TJit Union Pacific I. the Free Chair Car I
lint running into Union depots at Omaha j
nod Council Muffs, connecting with tlu
fast limited trains of all Unci for the cist, I
nortli and south. Through tickets on mod I
em day coaches. H.igguge cheeked thio' i
to destination from nil points east in the
Unltftl States and Canada. Sleeper ac I
conimod.ttions reserved on through Pull
man Palace Cars from the Missouri river i
to the Pacific coast. '
12. 11. SLOSSON, Agent, i
io4 () Street, Lincoln, Neh. i
T.J.Poitih, 12. II. Lomax, J.S.Tr.iim.T, '
ist v. i. A.c. i'. kr. . j.i. u..
PomeroyCoal
COMPANY
DEALERS IN
Coal and Wood.
Good supply oil
High Grade Soft J
anq Hard Coal al-1
ways on hand. I
1201 O St.
J. R. LEMIST,
Agent.
LINCOLN
Dime Museum !
Cor Tenth nnd N Street.
SAHDERSON S KHEE, Props, and M'grs.
OPEN DAILY A FAMILY RESORT
Matinee every afternoon at 2 p. in.
2 Two Performances Each Evening. 2
First at 7 o'clock, second at 9 p.m. Change
of program tvvlcj weekly.
The Royal Marionettes, the Chair Equi
librist, the Hydra Headed "What Is
It?" Hop Slug with Chinese Song
and Dance, the Wonderful
Skeleton, the I Undo Jug
gler, Old Snowball
with Plantation
Song a 11 d
Dance.
Don't fall to see Zu-I.i, the living half
lady. The London Times says : Zulu Is
conundrum. How this young lady eats,
thinks, moves about anil iu fact, csists
with onlj amis and body, is tut wonder of
the present age. Ik who can see through
the Illusion must he a person of marvelous
penetration."
Tne New York Herald says : " A erU
ablt marvel of ingenuity."
The Indian Dally News, Calcutta,
7. cl'Iii Is a beautiful girl or as seen In the
hlhlllon a beautiful half girl." Thou
ids will guess In wiln where the other
Is, must he to he believed.
on exhibition at the Lincoln museum
WHAT SHALL WK WEAR?
BLOW DUT SURE GROWTH OF THE
"UNION" OR "HEALTH" GARMENT.
fashions for Ijullrn' Umleirlnthlnir In
Iiiulcm itml In w York f I rout Diver
nil) of Ntjles In lloimol 1-IihmI for
Mlihvlntor.
Itonnot for midwinter Include not only
tunny st,los, but stylo Rimming great ex
tremes, such ns tutlo nnil flower linnets mid
velvet iKituii'tA trimmed wtlh fur. This
diversity nponrs to Iw n necessity, sotno
Indies of fashion must linvo a bonnet for
every occasion If notnlwolutoly onofor every
go MIL
FUU TIUMMEU f.'UOTH COSTCSIK.
For thotheatro and otlier evening occa
Bious nro graceful nPnlrs of lace, tullo,
flowers mid feathers. To wear with cloth
suits are now cloth bonnets or turbans.
Thcso nro trimmed, as a rule, to correspond
with tlio costume, ns is illustrated in the cut.
Tbo flue, bluo cloth dress nnd ielerlne oro
trimmed with I'crsiitn lamb or Astrakhan
andbruld. Tlio cloth hnt of exact color of
the suit has u brim of Astrakhan, and an
Astrakhan mulT completes tho stylish cos
tume. Russian Kablo is much usel as a trim
ming to w inter bonncts,nnd it often seems that
tho vrholo crown is of fur, thouylv, as rulo,
tho fur coui'ioses tho brim only.
IVINTKIl nOVNETS.
In tho second cut Is shown nn imported
winter 1 1011110 1 oi' exceedingly stylish shape.
It is of scarlet velvet. Tho elvet, arranged
in plaits going upward, corcra tlu crown of
this bonnet and provides tlio plaited trim
ming in front. A deml-wreath of greon
glossy feathers, crowned ubovo with 11 feather
aigratto, and a bow and strings of ribbon
four and threo-quarter inches wide, shot with
red nnd green, givo tlio fashionable orna
mentation. I Night Drosses unit Under Linen.
, In London, it appears, thcro it u decided
tendency to color in tho wear of night
drosses and under linen, and many of tho
leading houses sell sets of thoso to mutch, in
cluding tho two necessary articles of daily
wear and the night dress. Bomu very pretty
ones oro in cambrio with flno narrow linos of
colors. In Now York, ladies, as a rulo, pro-
1 fer tho articles mentioned in whlto linen,
muslin or jvxcnlo; tho color in their under
wear liolng confined to fanciful iwttlconts,
Bilk corsets and tho pretty ribbon trimmings
SSKK.inS. SS"
Bilk skirts, lined with flannel, nro very fash
ionably worn instead of tho ordlnnry Uannel
petticoats. Under silk petticoats, not llnod
wfth flannel, or quilted flannel petticoats, in
broad, contrasting stripes, aro worn; thoso
oro generally edged with a rather thick
washing lnco or embroidery.
Ileform or Health OurinonU.
Tho undergarments and health waists In
troduced to tho public a dozou or moro years
ago under tho general namo of "leform gar
ments" liavo met with exceedingly slow
growth, btlll they liavo mndo some advanca
At tho present tlmo tho union garments,
in wool, silk and muslin, share favor with
tho two-pieco garments. Tlio former liavo
been adopted by many lieeauso of their com
fort, convenience and economy; by others
thoy aro patronized to some extent w 1th tho
Idea thnt one's stays und bodice lit moro
tnugly nbovo them Hum with tho two-pleco
underwear.
I'l'lincs from tlio World uf fashion.
From I'm is comes word thnt "tight lacing,
largo mtlca and the high hat are doomed."
Hussar jackets are worn for deml toilet.
Among recent novelties iu tea gowns Is
noted 0110 of cream colored China silk,
trimmed with llulTy gray fur ami a profusion
uf yellow liblion.
lm 3s " -
THE DROOKLYN TADERNACLE.
Dr. TiilmiiKK i tlm Plitlfonti Ontlnrlcul
rower of lli Niiteil I'lriirlii'i'.
The llrst object Hint strike, tho Mtor to
tho llrool.l.vuTiilornnelo Is the Innnoiisoor
gnu l'iiunptl at 7il5 o'clock tho organist
runs his lingers over tho lory keys, and
pin, two or throe selections. At tho exact
moment of ' Dr. Tnliuiigu walks on tho
plntroim. lilt black broadcloth funk coat '
ii thrown iin'ii. A turned down eollnr enclr- '
den his ii" I,, and n black tie covers his
snowy shiit front. Ho dropi Into it bluo ,
plush tlmlr.iiud 11 moment in sH'iit In prayer.
Then he ndjiutt his glnssn to lih ejes nnd p
ujH'liH hU Illblc. Tho oi-gan peals forth
"I'ratso (Jod, from Whom All lllesslngs
Flow " A stout, well built man slops on n
miiiiII platform nnd wnven hlsilhthaud. In
hl' left ho holds n silver 001 not 'litis he
puts to hi mouth and loads tho Mist nudieueo
iu song. Then is no choir or ipiaitottoiu '
tho TnlN'runi'li Tho singing Is out hvly by '
tbo cougrogalioii. After this Dr. Tahniigu
steps forward. Tho jsmiI of tho organ has
Imnlly dliil away lxfoio ho antioiiiui'i his
Illblo rending. Ho holds the goisl hook in
Ills right hand, close to his face. Ills left
hand steal nrouiul to his back mid clutchos
nervously nt his coat tall. Ho begins Inn
well rounded but not musical voice. Tlio
vast nudlenco is hushed in xeotnney. Tho
fnll of a pin could bo hoard. Hlowly tho
preacher proceeds. It is tho over delightful
story of Ruth that ho lias selected. Ho roads
floutoneo after sentenco, and iu 11 ionersa
tionnl wny iuJivLs coiuinents until tho old
story, Hint nil the world has laughed ami
cried ovor, Mimcslcd with anew lightunda
now moaning. After tills iiuntlier hymn mid
then the collection. As tlio ih-iuiIoh, dimes
nndipinitei-HjInglomusleiilly together In tho
collection 1k).os tho conn list plays again.
Tho grout church Is by this time full to over
flowing. TIkto Isn't stnuding loom any
where. Mnsslve chandeliers light up tho
building perfectly, and tho stained glass
windows innVo u jiretty mid eiroctlvo bock-gi-ouuiL
Then the sermon logins. Tho pronclicr
conn's down to tho front of tho platform with
out note- or even 11 book iu his hand. IIo
doesn't uso 11 tablo or pulpit. Ho stnuils
nlono. Every ejo is on him. Ho given out
his test in it clear, loud, rinlng oiee, nnd
rejienti it twice. Ho usually lupins tho ser
mon by 11 hnst woiil picture of tho seeno
when Hid toxt is laid, or by 1111 nnicdoto.
The sermon lasts forty minutes. It is full of
vigor and I'm nostnoM. Indeed, that is tlio
chief 1 hnraotoristle of Tahnao on tho plat
form, lie is In earnest lie talks quickly,
nervously. He paces up mid down tho plat
form, and now tells 11 story iu 11 low. sweet
voice, and again ho liolohos forth lll.o Vesu
vius, nnd makes tlio ''Imudcliti-M riiltlo witli
thosoiiud f hlsvoieo. At times ho Is in
tensely humorous. Again ho has tho nudl
enco iu tears Again, ho Is so tlrjiunlic
that tlio com lotion forces itself upon you
Hint If ho had taken to tho stage instead of I
tlio puipit lie would liavo timdu 11 great actor. 1
"What words did tho Muster uso when tho
winds ami waves lashed (hilileo into a fury I"
ho shouts.
Ho stops back a half dozen feet, nnd for 11 I
moment there Is silence. Then hocomes 1 nsli- I
ingilown the platform like 11 tornado until ,
ho reaches tho very edge. His hands nro up
lifted. Ho turns his fnco to tlio ceiling until
his mouth I j 011 it straight lino w ith his ears, 1
ami in 11 pleading volco says, softly, music
ally: "IVii'v!"
Quick as a Hash his hands coinn flown. His
faco lias lost Its sweetness His volco Is
changed mid harsh, und tho sentenco is com
pleted by 1111 awful and Intensely driimatie
yell: "Ho stllll" It Is tlio vouiof authority.
Onllleois stilled. Thcro mo "Oil's" iu the
audience, and it man iu 11 pew in front of mo
leans over to his companion and whisjiers:
"I never understood tho moaning -of thut
sentenco lieforc."
Tlio vast nudlenco novcr loses interest. It
Is an audleuco 111111I0 up fully two-thirds of
men Is'tween tho ages of liuind '' They
belong to nil walks iu life. 801110 nro stu
dents, others nro actors und playwrights,
young ministers, blinkers, hi okt is, lawyers
and stoiol:eoors. They laugh at tho anec
dotes, and they cry and listen reverently,
tenderly, to tho manly pleading to coino to
Jcmk Foster Coates iu New York SIulI nnd
Express.
'I I10 Opiil Niiirrlltlmi.
Commenting on it recent article on tho
opal sticrstitlo!i, Alniingcr I.elgh S. Lynch
said: "If bio has anything to do with it,
mnru than tho usual amount of dcsistcr and
dismay should hiio followed tlio very largo
nnd lustrous opal I unco got fi 0111 .Mexico.
Tho.flrst day I woie it I visittsl n largo ivory
house lor the purpose of buying a pair 0
brushes. They hud nothing thut suited mi
until tho salesman Ashed from an upjiei' shelf
a puir of osipilsjtely carved brushes. 'Those,'
said he, 'were ordered more than n yeurugo
by a stranger who never called for them.
to marked this peculiar monogram on tho
I back lor him 11 branch of the business wo
turu over to others except iu very raio cases
and it sjhpiIs tho sale.' I looked at tho mon
ogram, und imagine my astonishment when
I read the very uncommon combination of
letters that I wanted iu tho design I should
liavo selected of all others.
"There was n clnmcu for jsychological
meditation in tho incident, but 1 simply called
it good luck that gave mo tho brushes at less
! than one-third their value. In tho next fow
nioutlis, v Idle I woro tho opal, I tw ico missed,
by less than a minute, trains which met with
accidents; uns compelled, because my tegu
lar hotel was crowded, to stop at another iu
a certain town, nnd wns awakened by tho
flames (muring out of tho ono I didn't get a
room iu, and my show was conspicuously
successful iu towns that nro known iu tlio
profession as 'frosts.1 In short, of bad luck
thcro wasn't u trace while I woro tho o-wl,
, and when I ceased wearing it I didn't let it
got outside ot my family. "Chicago News.
Tho Dirty Window rune.
A tidy houso)'ee,er of Lisbon, Me., was
much troubled by n certain window pauo in
her parlor. Do what sho could sho couldn't
got it clean. She tried acids, alcohol and
window rubbers to 110 purpose. Her luisUind
laughed at her and said he could clean thut
glass. Huhled. Ittomuiuod Just us dingy
as Ixjforo. Then' tlio housckoc'iei' called iu it
glazier mid told him to take out tho ofTcnd
ing glass, Ho started to do so, and found
that somehow or other two panes of glass had
lieoiihct In thnt sash, und tho inside of each
pauo wu . dusty. Of courso the dust couldn't
bo readied by washing. It was a very sim- 1
plo solution of whut Ugnu to seem almost a ,
mystery. Nuw York Hun. 1
lloaton Corlietl'n (inn.
Slnco llostoii Corltett has been plnced in
tlio insane nsylu.n his elfocts at Concordia,
Kan., liavo passed into the hands ot an ad
ministrator, nod among them was tlio iden
tical Enfield rillo with whleli Corls'tt shot
tho slayer of Lincoln, This old weapxm has
boon purchased for $.1 by it drund Army of
tho Republic it ut Concordia, and will bo
kept as 11 lolie. Clilcngo Ileruld,
Tlio English system of naval punishment Is '
to Ik revised, and minor olfenees, instead of
being treated to tho cut and sweat box, will
now bo punished by flues and stopuigoof '
leave.
THE SMALL DOY.
A Ynimintrr Hlin MUed t'j Cards -tUW
HU l'iii)m.
A -l-jonr-old boy In this city war atausl"-
hlmiielt ono recent ovenlng by Imitating V
father and mother, who weroplii)lngouohw
Tho child held u ek of curds and would lay
a card on the Moor every llnie hlsmothei
laid one on the table, and would say, "I
pass," etc., when she did. Hod Ilmo cr.mo,
nnd with it the usual child's ptnyer with tho
common ending, but this tlmo the youngster
wound up thus) "(lis! bless mpu, nmmmn
nnd ball) 1 niss clubs trumps. Ameul '
Now Yoik Woild,
A 1'iir Hluhtcit Hoy,
A-l-jenr "Id Isiy wns taken to tho window
nfew iiiiiiuiugs since and shown tlio bright j
planet of the moiulng sky, which was shin
ing with tomaikahlo brightness through an
except IoiimII eleur atmop!.oro. IIo wns
told that It was Venus, and udmlrod It
greatly. At tho breakfast table ha related
the exerlenoo with groat animation.
"I saw-11 big star," ho said; "Itsiiamo was
Peanuts, and II was K)lutcd at both ends."
As Iho foi m of tho planet is that of iisluini
(minted oi-oMflit, it Is evident that that Isiy h
ejos me lunch hotter to bo tiusUtl than his
oars. Uil 011 Tninsci Ipt.
Tim Sun I of Omul or.
AKimdnv scIukO teacher begun his quc
tlonliiK'. .'on it tho old j oar with tho
query: "Are uhi .K'tter than oil were I'nt
yiitrl" A goml many of Iho llttlo fellsAS
hail replied ' Vos.flr;" but it crimpy isiy on
tho back seat had th ,courngti of hiscouvio
tluns. "I linln't mi better nor I over wur.," ho
said, ''hut," ho added, by way of softening
tho hnrsh statement, "I got '0 sorest front of
nnyboilv in this elnss-I I I nioft got
dlpfotia "- Youth's Companion.
A llt'lli'i'tliin t'Hili dm Tenclier.
A llttlo boy und his sister ouiii lioni" from
tho closing exercises of ono of tlio ptlblio
schools tho other day. 7ho eerllflfntm for
regular ntteudaueo and good conduct had
Ihs'U distrlhiited, and tho gill was tho proud
ris'lplent of ono of them, but her brother had
failed to ipmlify. "Didn't you got a eortill
cato, Toinmj I" their mother arl.isl "No'm,"
was tlio icply, "but I would Imvo got one If
thcro had Issui enough to go round." To
ronto QIoIhj.
'llix "Cuko" IVn .ill sled I'tii'.
u3Inimnn,n wilil llttlo Willie, nfler leturn
Ing from 11 dinner to which ho had Is-on in
vited, "I alius kinder thought that cako was
just cake; but I see t hero's n dillcrciico Iu it.
Aunt Susan's cako Is cako mi' plo an' piiddiu'
nn' 1' iclies an' Icecroaui an' everything gaotl
togethei, but youin Is notliiu' but cako."
ElmiiaTidiugH.
llurrj's llelllilllnn.
I have it llttlo boy, Hurry, ngexl !. Eloo
tlo'i day ho asked mow hat pnpn was going
to vote for I told him for tho mayor. His
' sister asked mo what tho mayor was.
"Well," ho said, "girls don't know nollln; it
I is a gli ) boss, of course." llostoii Ololn.
Tho curious effect it has. Life.
A Dear I.lttln IVIIitw.
Mrs. Houdrleks (to husband) Hobby nsked
mo last night if Ood bent tho rain, and 011 my
telling him yes, said ho supjiosed ho must
jiour it down through tho stars Denr llttlo
fellow.
Mr. Ileulricks Yes; Hobby Is it nlco llt
tlo Now, who tho mischief Illlod my
shoo full of banana skins?
Mrs. Hendricks Oh, I suppose It was
Bobby. Now York Sun.
Another I'r.iml I'xpipsed.
Walter Girl You better get your bonrd in
advance from that man what says bo's u.
United States dotectivo.
Landlady IIo looks honest.
"He's no detectlvo; ho'd never suspect any
liody of anything. Ho nto his mlnco plo
without onco looking under tho crust. "
Omaha World.
Clreiimstiincos Agnlmt Her.
Wlfo (nt breakfast) Oh, dear, I liavo M
much to do, and tho children and servants
try mo sol
Husband And you don't look well, olthor,
my deu r.
Wife No; but when thcro Is nothing but
turmoil nnd confusion, nnd ono is cxjiccted to
look after everything, w hat iossiblu pleasure
Is there In lioing sick! Now S'ork Hun.
A Mluht MIlnko.
First Scicntlst-Eh What did you sayj
Second Scientist I Bald nothing. A couplo
of horses attached to a big wagon loaded with
stone Just run away nnd dashed into that
stono quarry up there.
"Oh, thnt was it. I thought you spoko to
mo in volopuk." Oinahu World.
What Ho llud round.
I henrd a good story tho other day on a
freshman In ono of our Now England col
leges. On being nsked by his professor by
whom and 011 what occasion tho term "Eu
reka" wns first used, ho replied, "lly Demos
tlicues, when he sat down 011 the pin for
which ho wns hunting " -Hoston lleoord.
Nut the .Solitary Ojstur.
At tho church sociable; Vivnclous young
lady fiucss vv nut wo nro going to liavo to
night, Mis. llaseom eharadosl
Mrs. liascoui I knowed itl I smolt o'm
clear out tothoguto. Iiuilmgtou Free Press.
A I'mtliii; I tijiiiu-t Ion.
Traveling Salesman tto employer) Well,
I'nioir. Mr. Smith. Uixid-hyl
Employer liissl-bj and a sucivssful trip.
And rimoiulK'r, Mr. l.ntward, tluit order is
I1e.1v en's lint 1 iw, Now Y01 k Sun.
An i:pi iiiiition.
''Hixi here, waiter, how is it that I And 11
tiouers but ton Iu this salad I"
"Uatiuiiii jnu; of do dreasiu' s.ih." Life,
lilt I. Willi II IIOSllllllllll.
1 ' --1 r""1
Av -fin vifuR
THC GERMAN DAnortR.
Ho Wikok liKiuUltlTr, lias it I'luttt nasi
Wins the Dny.
"You s rt ir. eouiuiereliil drnlller, chr
"No."
Tho nsslstnnt to tho Oerman burlier wtu
the one who asked tho tpicstlou, addressing It
to it slender but middle ugisl man In thochnlr
nt which hoenriusl his far from monotonous
way through life. Ho had shaved this cus
tomer two or thus" times Is-foro, aiul was
endeavoring to llud out all nlsiut him, as all
ImuIs'ih always have done when their curi
osity was up and their man was down and
lathered und well tucked Iu.
"Oh, you're choost it glerk by usdoro, I'liP
"No; slmviMip whin you git to 1110 neck.
Me neck Is tinder."
"Ceitentl.v ; I know dot. Miiyimyou ihoii
In tier Ilgger hsiii'ns. Veil, dot's n lino
Hsrnoss, bin tickler uf J 011 got 11 good
shtnnd. 1 know it front ot mine from der
minio wlllugo vhero I vos bom, und ho
got"
"Mo frlnd, O'lm not in the saloon irnue, ni.
all, and so ye'ro Joost wnstln' yer breath.
Aisy wld your inror on um chin."
"All rlghdt you keob your iKernesa by
yourselhif I choost like to innko inlncwdluf
bollto lull v oil, dot's all "
Tho Job was piaetlciilly llnlshisl, Iho last
strokes ot tho brush wero being nppllcd, when
"tho monkey barber," as tho Ik always
culled him, on account of his foolishness, ex
hlbllod 11 loss both of temper 11111I discretion,
owing to tho customer's ictleonoo.
"Uf you os nsliamoil vim your iss'ness
you douo light not to told soiiusilngHiiiHivvd
dot; vol It os. A man's got U put von eyo
out und look sharp like der lelllo nowadays,
, on ackouud uf Anthony tlomstwks und In
sltector Villlanis mid der society for der bro-
I weiuloiiuf oiiielty,uhctty; baitiekler uf ho
vos doing grookod pis'ucss, jet '
"Thunder mid stars!" shoutisl tlio cus
tomer, literally Iswldo himself and springing
outof thoelialr. "Fwhatd'jo mniio at all.
wid yer slack I Mobizness In mo blzness, and
it's not Iho lights of iiuny monkey faced,
crocked Jawisl larrup Iv 11 Dootch divll to
crass ipiistioii mofwhlnlvor ho has mo laid
1 out iu 11 chair at his eouvanlenoo Mo hi.
ness, Is IU It's llekln' Iho DikhoIij that's
f m htil it Is. TIioiv, now ; come on, now, till I
1 K)llsli the Hun wld yer head."
I "Hiil' mil Hdop 11 lootlol Vnlt chiMist a
, inlnutol" said tho Imks, ruslilng to tho uld of
his assistant, "DIs ding's got to lsvu bluyod
owd. WhiH-irer licks dot my must llrst lick
I iiilncM'lhif. It vos llfo year, now', vot elTery
bugimeloiis lrlshmans by dor city has eci(
1 licking dot jsiy, und it costs m it vook'H
Mines for 11 subs! liliKit each dime abotty."
"Ui'll lick thotwoav jerundiill jir rela
tions." said tho Irato customer. "IVjo think
Ol'il lay shtlll and lotacnmlu plctuio from
a Disitcli paper walk nil over mu wld his
tongue '
I "t'liiiuimy crnckyl" shouted tho (lermnn
Imrlier, seizing thu hot water kottlo with Its
' gallon of lsilllng eonlenls. "A man can't dlo
1 moro us vonco, alrotty. Run, or I IkjII you
I init der Lett In. Chukot Vhy der tlckens
don't you do tomedlugsl Kick tier stofo ofer
und gllmb by der sdroet und jell llko soxty,
or clniinp down his tioat und enrvo your vny
owd fi 0111 his IkkiIs mlt der inznr. I show
you, you pig loaver."
At tho siiuio Instant tho (lerinnu burlier bo
gnu to swing tho kettle like n madman. Tho
assist nut lifted tho great blab of marblo olT
the table, and both advanced toward tho cus
tomer. They weio too much for him. IIo
j seized his hat mid overcoat und lied, pausing
at tho door to hiss something about it luuutlo
asylum ltotwecn his teeth.
When ho had gono tho (lermnn harbor
tlropissl Into it chair Iu a paroxysm of
t laughter.
I "Clinko," said ho, "dot's der grentost day
uf my llfo. New York Hun.
STRAY J0KE8.
It Is tho dry goods clerk who most fre
quently sales under falso colors. Now Haven
News.
If there is anything In tho world which
will mnkoii man forget that his Joints aro
stiff, it is to stop on it squeak doll on mi tin
lighted stairway. Philadelphia Call.
1 Young Lady (in shoo store) I wnut them
plenty large Proprietor (measuring foot)
Yes, mis.; joti want throes. Young Lady
No; twin 1110 my sizo. Ylin Epoch,
1 "You ii(edii't order 1110 around, sir," said
tho washerwoman. "I'm not tho hired girl.
It's Dridgct'u place to look after tho milk.
I'm tho laundry lady " "That doesn't scaro
mo," said tho man. "I'm tho milk gcntlo
man and I'm tho P. W. O. It. IC of tho U. O.
Q. O. and Most Eminent Past (J. W. of tho
Ancient Order of M. X.Q.Z, and I want
somebody to tako this milk." "Yes, sir,"
said tho washerwoman meekly, ns sho wont
to flnil a crock. Chicago 'I ribmie.
Ami so every day lie gave ttiq Almighty
Advlco which he deemed of groat worth;
Ami his wife took iu sewlnj;
To keep tliltiRS h-roIiik
Wlillo ho superintended tho earth.
Tlio Churchman.
A young lady, visiting for tho llrst tlmo in
tho country, was alarmed at tho approach of
a cow. Klu was too frightened to run, and,
shaking her parasol ut tho animal, sho said
in a very stent tone: "Lio down, slrl Ho
down I" New York Tribune
Tho chess club lias occupied its present
quarters for a remarkably long tlmo. Usu
ally chess players want to move. Now Or
loaus Pica, imu.
Tho figures of this year, Ikvs, rescmblo
three big girls und a dudo as they spread
themselves ncross tho pavement on a flno
afternoon Willlamsport Sun and llancer.
Some 0110 asks: "Does it pay ti lo goodf
Perha'Bj our evidence in tho in lit. r will not
bo taken, and so wo shall not answer tho
question directly, but wo wid say that it is
good to Ihj paid. Lowell Citizen.
Tho joung man who would vvasto tlmo kiss
ing a girl's hand would oat tho brown jiajicr
bag mid leave the hot house grapes for somo
ono else. Souiervdlo Journal.
Oft times utter 11 man has soon his "auto"
ho is compelled to go und seo his "uncle."
Tho Ejioelu
Lot 11 limn sit down on n bent pin and he
will arise promptly and speak briefly to tho
point, Now- Orleans Plcayuno.
It is IioihsI Hint tho man who predicted
that w wore going to have 11 warm winter
hasn't 11 bushel of coal iu his bin, nnd is
snow id up 100 miles fiom a coal yard. Nor
ristowu Herald.
Young vlghty-elclit,
Wiipat jour iH'ijihl,
And trust on'll not decreas In weight.
IIo tcinpctvlslil.
Tobacco llelj;llt,
And don't tttuj out until it's lelKlit.
llttsburg Ciiroilcle.
A line, I nil .Millie.
Horry How den, n IS je.tr-old colored boy,
ot Maitm, has tho hu got mouth of iiuybody,
big or little, In these parts. When hoojiens
it w nlo tho 001 tiers i'f the mouth 1110 less than
half an inch front thelolsjof each ear, Ho
can put his (1st In his mouth; cut hold two
egg in It without lUrduulty, nnd his hut tri
umph vits to tako In it toy balloon . nd then
mll.ito it to its full sue, llcrry i very proud
of his mo'ith Atlanta Constitution.
SOMETHING NEW.
Wi'have piiiulniH'tl the incut mnrkct of
Manger llros (fonncrty Hhcricr & Ilcnl
rclch) 138 H. nth Street We will carrv n
full line of
Fresh and Salt Meats, Lard, Fisli,
Gamo, Poultry, Butter, Es, Etc.
Wholecale und Resall. (Joods bcllvcrei! tt
any jmrt of the city. Telephone Cm. Come
nnd sec u.
IIOVBY&SON.
H. W. BROWN,
Dealer In
Drugs and Medicines
PAINTS,OIIiS,ClIiASS.
Books, Stationery, etc.
1 37 S. Eleventh st.
BLOOD POISON.
Old limit troth ciintnlii
. tlio niiliili'MeiKit of IiIikkI
ikiImiiiI Who rim snnlloir
It, ntiolilMit nut of old livlli
nt every 111114I nnd li
lipsltliy? Tlnwi livlli nrn
iloft.il, iilrrritted, null nllliy
lrotiiontly rnii.o n mi'lliM
fnru. HI1011I1I ccrlnl'ily Ihi
eitrnclisl nnd reiilaiisltvllli
KikmI, nrllllclnl irclli tied
nnvurnclie fun lie imtract
M vtltliuiil pilu, N11I111111.
Iiiir.
New Years iToclamntion.
In nrdur llml eiery 111111 limy lu iiMti In out liirkoy
tlmiikfiilly, wo will put up ntlliVlnl li'ctli nt tlio fnf.
Ins low ruliw iinlll tlm 1st of J Henry; Wll
mliiKtniiTuutli, $i, Sloley'ii Tu"tli, imisl mora tlmn
ny inupin in i iniiiin, n very linn nrllcia,
ot: Willie's Put ill Tt'ulli. Willi tiliitiis r
J7B0 iwr
of diiulil
trrniitli. wrnr wllli n istihiiiiiiI ihiIIIi. imM.wcb
pUlcn, lirldKU work, etc, nt in most rmuioiiiihl
nrlciw. ItfMiiii No III, IAHO strict, iuldwlu llros.
lllock. Lincoln Neb
Dlssaiod Qums.
i?S
Thn teeth turn black and din, the umi bleed at
tlm idjiilt touch, ulrrrali), tlio tec ill loosen aud
fall nut, tho breath Is linrrlulo.
DR. A. P. BURRUS,
1200 O fitroot,
On the TUtntil Truimlt, cuim up diseased Rtimi,
make tbo ilnttt Kold and platinum fllllrii:, iuk4S
tbo CumI tcoth that tobacco will not UruUh.
PEERLESS
Steam Laundry
1117 P Street.
still In tho front nnd absolutely leading all
v,niK)lltoi's. Tlioiougbly equipped for th
nest work, giving to each customer nn un
'lunllflisl guarantee for nil work done. All of
our work done with neatness nnd drqiatch.
We solicit orders for suburban villages und:
1 vlgblsu Ing towns, pitying the uxpiess on itil
inters one way. lles'H.'Ctfully,
C. J. PRATT.
S. H. BURNHAM,
BROKER.
Mon.-y loaned on long or abort time at lowMt
itea. Office In Illcborus' lllock, room 21
Take, elevator on Eleventh aixeet entxmoa.
0.A.SHOEMAKER.M.D.
Hoiiitcopalliist Physician,
Telephone No, 685.
163 South nth Street, Li.molm Neu
Crystal Steam Laundry
Will cull for, and promptly deliver nil w o
entrusted to tlicin, und fluUh samu
ill latest and best imtuuer.
NEW MCHINERY,
and lxt facilities iu tho city, for doing stria t
ly flrst-flasH work. Our new locations are
LAUNDRY, Corner 24th and OSts.
CITY OFFICE; 119 N. 12th Street.
TELEPHONE No. 478.
I?A tiinl vvill convince you that the
Prt s-t . il I.uj tli ik t ihi lit it I til w 11 nt1f 1st 41a.
i v-i J mm tlVx i Htv- i(i t.4tl J IMMIt, til IU IT
sdtte
Nook anyplace.
Having arranged my sample rooms for
the convenience of the public nnd stocked
it with tilt best brands of
Wines, liquors & Cigars
I would respectful!,, solicit a share of pub
lic patronage. M,' goods ure all verv fine
and from the oest makers, nnd 1 will" take
pleasure in filling all order for
FAMILY SUPPLIES.
In connection with my
conduct a first class
sample loom I
LUNCH COUNTER.--
wiicre at aiy time u short order lunch may
X had ut reasonable pi ices. Call and see
aic.
No. 1015 O Street.
ami
WttMftAfflMft
ysgpr
I
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