Image provided by: University of Nebraska-Lincoln Libraries, Lincoln, NE
About The Nebraska advertiser. (Nemaha City, Neb.) 18??-1909 | View Entire Issue (March 3, 1905)
f i V - - v CI JOKES FROM THE PENS OF RIOU8 HUMORISTS. VA- Pleasant Incidents Occurring the World Ovcr-Snylnc that Aro Cheer ful to Old or YoiuiK-Vuniiy Selections that You "VY111 Enjoy. "After Christmas I always put my presents away tagged with tho name of the sender." So you will always know In after years just who sent them?' "No; In sending them away next year I might forget and glvo ono ta tho person who presented It to me." Illinois Stato Journal. Misdirected Effort. "I have here," said the amatour In ventor, as he oxtrncted a small model from his grip, "a devlco that will warn the engineer of a train whon any one is crossing tho track." "No good," rejoined tho railway manager. "It's the party crossing the track that requires tho warning." Tt Worked. "Why don't you try horseback rid ing?' asked the slim man. "Tliey saj that will reduce iloah.' "I did," tersely answered tho fal man. "Did It have any effect?" "Mado the horse skinnier." She Bid Too Hiirh. Bdyth I offered young Saplelgh c penny for Ills thoughts last evening. Maymc I'm ashamed of you, Bdyth Edytii Ashamed of mel Mayme Yes, or rather of your abil ity as a shopper. Chicago News. Spoiling It. Tess Ho's a reporter, you know, and ho wants my photograph for hla paper. Jess Indeed? What's the Idea? Tess Why, ho's going to write n piece about me; he's going to say I'm a beautiful young debutante and all that Jc3S If ho's going to say that, dear,' you'd better not lot him use tho plo tunc. Philadelphia Press. Real Thins. "You acted like a fool when you pro posed to me," said the wife in aftei years. "You aro mistaken, my dear," an swered the meek and lowly husband "The mere fact that I proposed to you la sufficient proof of my innocence nt an actor." Insinuating;. Ernestine I don't seo why yout chaperon should, have been offended becauso Jack played the piano. 11 was certainly better than lovemak ing. Moyrtilla Yes, but he insisted upon playing "Always in tho Way." True Politeness. i Daughter of the Boss (disheveled nnd torn after ono turn round the rooic with clumsy partner) Do you mini V5ry much, Mr. Quickstep, If wo sit out tho rest of It? Mr. Quickstep .Test as you Ilka miss. I'm only a-dandn' for youi pleasure. Pnrndoxicnl. Biggs What makes you think De Jones has come down in tho world? Plggs Becauso he's now living the top floor of a tcnomcut. on Unsympathetic. "Mister," said tho husky hobo as he approached tho man at tho front gate fin't youso liolp a pore feller wo alnt got no homo?" tyo Jiomo?" echoed ITenry Peek, "flK yon'vo got no kick coming IV iMaVHfN Kit 7U EHI'KKOR OF ItTJSIA 8KES NEKD OF HASTY ACTION. COUNTRY IN AN UPROAR CAUCASUS IIUGION I'ICT'J ItED AS IN STA'IM OF KKVOJUX. I'r.ar Iillcowrlun Maid to ITnve Commit' tod lllinnnlf Townril Effort to , Km tho Wiir I'ositlbla TcrniB of I'enqo BERLIN. The Vorwacrorts prints a special dispatch without Indicating tho place from which It was sonfc saying': "Too whole Caucasus ro plou Is In revolt. Armcplans, Prus sians and Circassians have formed a coalition against the empoior o Russia and seized arms and even caunon from K-.sslan soldiery. They hold tho governor of tho district as a prisoner. The revolution is organ izing camps outslno tho cities." SI. PETERSBURG.--Evon In tho midst of his cilofover the death of Grand Duke Serglus, evidence exls s that Emperoi Nicholas is giving h's attention to political developements but reports as to his Intentions aro conflicting. Indications point toward a decision to revise the zemsky zobor and some rumors oven Rive the dato wheu tho proclamation convening that body will bo ifsued. These rumors however, probably are pre mature, but there Is little doubt In tho best inrormod quarters that the emperor's decls'on will bo favorable, although It Is understood tl at the court party Is still fighting desper ately for time, maintaining that it would be an Irreparblo blunder to yield in the fnco of torrorlsm even if It should be advisable later on. Contrar? to previous reports, It 1b now 'iaid that tho last woid from Grand Duke Serglus to the emperor, contained In a letter broupht by Prince Scnirinskv Sohakmaloff, was to stand Arm. According to earlier xoports Serglus, seeing mat opposi tion was useless, outlined in this letter a plan for a zemsky zobor, ro strlcted as much as possible In its powers. Home persistent reports delcare that Emperor Nicholas not only has decided to convoke a representative body, but that he is also bent on making peace. He is represented to have taken this decision chiefly on the advice of Emperor William. Tho conditions of peace which Rm- B'a can arcept aro freely discussed here. Tho only obstacle to peace Is said to be the question of indemnity, which Russia will refuse to pay. While pea-.e reports are rlrcululinc In oflloal and other quarters in St. Petersburg tho Information reaches the Associated press that General Kuropatkin is industriously prepar ing tn try final conclusions with Field Marshal Oyama and that a de cisive battle may be expected within a fortnight. Capt. William B. Judson, U. S. A., and other foreign military attaches have been asked to leave Vladivos tok. While no reason has been as-signed, it is probible that this action is in anticipation that oper atlons will begin here as soon as spring opens. According to latest reports Em peror Nicholas Is greatly dissatlstied with tb.2 conduct of General Grlppcn herg while he was in Manchutia, and that he was not only sustained Genoral Kuropatkin but has ordered General Grlppenberg to return to hla post. It is gossip In court circles that General Grlppenberc's face was far from cheorful whon ho left the emperor's presence. Tho railroad Btrlko situation is re ported to be growing worse in the southwest and private advices are said to show the existanco of a reign of terror in Titjls and the Cauacasus Renerally. Many murdors by Tartars and Armenians are reported. Com munication has been aim jut cu.fi off, even the telegraphers striking, the few who are still at their keys being kept there with pistols at their head. Tho railroad employes at Dorpat struck yesterday. LONDON. -A dispatch to Renter's Tslnrrain company from St. Peters burg con 11 lining the Associated press advices of February 17 and 18, from St. Petersburg to the effect thai peace was under consideration adds: "The question of peaoo has not orriy been formally disoussed but the conditions on whioh Russia is pre narcd to make peace have practically hHM afcrtoed-rrpoti. - OAXX FOR A TiANO CONOUICSS HAH HOT UK EN ISSUED. Students Artnr Noisy Mooting clde to Strike j mill t'duon tloimt Hjdtcm of tlia 1' iu lilro 8tagni.nl, St. PETERSBURG, Martial, has vccn declared at Tsarsknc law Sclo wing to nurrcioiis threatening let ters being received at tho palace. The chief of the secret police has ordered special precautions to pre vent any ouirngo on tho imperial nmily. ST. PETERSBURG. The peas ants of tho two communes In the province of Voronesch, In Southwest Kusslvhavo been taken tho unpre cedented step or telegraphing direct to Emperor Nicholas asking that their wiiLcs be consulted In tho Get tlemeut cf the grievances in the matter of ronts in which they labor. Tho address, which is couched in the most loyal terms, prays God to grant health and long lift) to tho bolovcd monarch and his family and at tho sarno timo points out that tn the many years sinco lands were divided tho popuhtlon has almost doubled and the all tments which are bur dened with heavy dues and taxes are utterly inadequate to satisfy tho needs of the peasants and that it Is impossible to rent more land on ac count of the advanco In prices almost four fold in tho last fifteen years. With tho decision of the student bedy of tho great university of St, Petersburg to suspend students for the remainder of the university year, almost the whole educational system of Russia has entered upon a period of stagnation, the protest of the youth of Russia against tho beau' reaucratio system and other govern mental grievances. Other unlver titles cf Russia gymnasium and even grammar schools were already on strike, and tho military in var ious portions of the empire have been obliged to resort to force to restrain school boys of tender years who are Joining tho general move ment. The meeting or St. Petersburg students at which over 3.000 par ticipated besides voting with praot leal unanimity to suspend studies until Soptember 1, adopted Ta set of political resolutions, demanding the formation of a constituent assembly and cbarurterlzing tho pro posed summtnlriR of tho zemsky zobor us Inadequate for the emer- uency. Tho resolutions, after speak Ing of "tho progressive demoraliza tion of Russia, under tho influence of the absolute recline," delcare fur freedom of speech, the pro s, con science, the right of association and assembly and to strike, which are described as necessary conditions for the further rogress of Russia. The meeting unanimously decided to express dlsupproval of tho action of the government in dealing with the workmen who attempted to pre sent their petition to the emperor on January 22 and its sympathy with the victims of the soldiery. A large fraction voted In favor of stopping the war. A strong revolutionary feeling was manifested at the meet ing, tho rod flag was waved and the "Marseillaise" und other revolution ary Bongs were chanted. A large protralt of the emporor in the great auditorium of the university where the meeting was held was torn in strips. Tho police did not intoro fere. Strong forces of Cossacks bad been posted outside tho bulldlngB to pre vent an expected demonstration, but none occurred. Many professors and Instructors in tbe.unlversity were present at the meeting most of whom were in full sympathy with the objects of the Hssembly. Two tutors and a small uuinoor of Btudents wbo wished to obtain their diplomas this year made an ineffectual attempt to stem tho general tide. A joint committee of ewployors and workmen Instituted by the em peror to lovestigato the cause of labor disturbances is nuw taking eifeot. Ibe workmen of a number of large factories have already eleoted representatives to tho aBSomblage which will choose the members of tbo commission. The Patiloff con pany's men have taken a bold stop In selecting among their representatives wt a n mUrt rrt Vrt mm( (nf tail ttlM Mas jjuv. uw juii Mivut. vuo f aiwfr of J&mj3Ty.2.. . . KUItOPATKIN 8 AID TO IIAVR TAINEI) A IlEVERSK BUd- Condltloni In thn Conrmna Going From llnilto Wor.r trlke On H'nrnlmtY Itfieuot IU Ugliest (J tag ST. PETERSBURG. Rumors ar current In this city that General Kuropatkin has been outflanked by strong force of Japanese in tho vicinity of Slmintin and compelled to rotiro from tho Shakho river, bub olllclal dispatches, so far as mado public and tho Associated press Muk- din advices glvo no intimation that such continegnoy is even remotely possible. Military circlos .scout tho report entirely, and say no body tf Japanese of sufllclent strength has been reported operating on tho Rus sian right (lank to force Rcucral Kuropatkin to abandon his exceed ingly strong position on tho Shikho without a hard light lasting several days. The labor situation In St. Peters bug has assumed a phase most irri tating to employers, tho mon work Inu one day und quitting tho next nnd showing no permanentdlsposl- tion to cither work or strike At present there is no factories aro working, but most of the tolling when or to what extent tho srlko may next break out. According to mail roports received from Batoum, raolil disorders In tho Caucasus have developed into ictual revolution In tho cities of Batoum. Putl and Kutais, at tho eastern end of the Black sea, under the lead of Armenians, who have set up a form of provisional government. Tele graphic communication has been cut off for several days and it 1b Impos sible to seurce direct confirmation to thcee reports, but according to ono letter tho Armenian faction a few days ago succeeded in making pris oners of most of tho otlloials, and shutting up tho officers and some of the troops in the barracks and aided to somo extent by xessrvlsts in tak ing the reins of government Into their own hands. It is known that the seml-weckly steamer service be tweon Batoum and Odessa has been interrupted and until tolographlo c mtnuulcatlon is restored infoiraa Hon is ony obtainable by way of Constantinople. The authorities hero and others familiar with conditions In thovCau- ascu3 do notattach great Imnortancen of these reports. Several of the grand dukes loft for Moscow to attend tho funsral of the lato Grand Duke Serglus. Grand Duke Vladimir will not attend the funeral, ovlng to indisposition caused by a chill. Emporor Nlchilas has issued orders sped lying who may attend tbo funeral. All th"S0 who arefjntltled to attend tho mem bers of the court, naval and military oflicers, heads of the Judicial and ud miulstrative institutions, presidents of tbe mobility, tbe zemstvos of the province, tho mayor and foreign rep rc8cr.tatlves. Ladlos must weoi black cloth dresses and black bon nets Civilians must wear mourn Ing. All must arrive at the mon astery by 10:30 a. m. It Is explained at the foreign office that the departure from San Fran cisco of tbe three oflicers of tho Rus slan crusier Lena was owing to a misunderstanding. They had signed a rarole not to leave San Francisco without permission of tbe pioildnn.'' of the United States until an arr ment had been made between two governments. Subiequontli , when the final agreement between Rursla and the United States regard Ing tbe Lena was reached, the ofli cers supposed they were freo to como home. If tbo Uoitcd States insist) the officers doubtless will return to San Francisco. Three Japanese physicians who were held prisoners at Medvld, prov ince of Novgorod, Russia, have been released, representations have been, made by Japanese through Ambas sador McCormlck that their deten tion was a violation of tho Gonova convention. In response to the inquires of tho United States as to whether the a p. pointment of George V. L. Meyer, American uraba&sador to Italy, as ambaisador of St. Petersburg in succession to Robert S. McCormlck would be acceptable to Russia tbo United htates has been notified that Mr. Meyer Is personal grata tbt in peror having expressed his peneva Mimfe.. Neal Wyno of Peru has been cnow ks principal of tho school sab Chester. Farmers west of Poru have capt ured several largo wolves in tin last week. ' Tho Stoto bank at Stnia will begl tho erection in the spring of a nam bunk building in tho same location! as they now occupy. Bishop Williams of Omaha visiter Stella Sunday proichod and continued a class In tho Episcopal church J tho morning. Grip and pneumonia as well as uumbor of casos of scarlet fever, ar raging at Mason Olty and many bom are afflicted. Mrs. Henry wlfo of Andrew Ilcnrj both pioneers of Nebraska died aU the homo of hor daughcor-ln-law, Mrs. Henry was born at Hoosao Kails. Sho nnd Mr. Benry came toj tho stato in 1873. I August nnd Jamos B. Smith of Bcntrlco, Nobr., havo oommoncedj tult against tho Union Pacific rail- road for $1,100 each as damages ton Injuries which they claim they sufM crod while at Lincoln. I "Kathleon Mavournccn, the Irish comedy-drama, was proscntcd all Uozad Nobr.. by local talent. Thd play was glvon under tho auspices i bio Knights of Pvthlas lodgo an under tho direction of Duko FullorJ Thoro.l8 a dlosase among cattlo la Madison vlcnity. The Virginia ranch, four miles east, lost tlval head tho last week. The cattlo aotj as though thoy had been polsonod.1 Tho Bccond quartorly conforouci for tho Methodist Episcopal church Is in Fcsslon at Peru, Presiding Elder Wright of Nebraska City li tn charge of the meeting. County Clerk Jako Tannor Is slowlv recovering from a sovcro attack of hlnr.d poisoning at Ilumboldt which affected both arms and incapacitated bhn for his official duties for sever weeks. Ralph Smith whoso parents, Mr. and Mrs. F. J. Smith are pioneers of Lolgh, died at Albuquorquo N. M. Mr. und Mrs. Smith bad taken their! sou west for tho Bako of his health.! rionry H. Sanders a prominent) member of tbo Grand Army of thai Rcpublio, died at bis home in Sew nrd, Neb. last woek. lie was a pioneer of Seward county. . The senior class of the high school ab Beatrice elected these offioors Sat urday: Lawrence Weaver, presidents Miss Ilota Blvons, vlco president: Samuel M. Rlnrikor, secretary; Miss Graco Oarro, treasurer. Otis Slmmus, who struck GbrUj Stucks with a billiard cue during quarrel at Nlras Olty a snort timej aso, has been sentenced to three mon bus in tho oounty Jail at Hura-v holdt. , Frantz Lomm, an aged farmer of Cuming county, died at tho Green Crco hotel In West Point as tbe re suit ol an accident by which be lost his hand In a cornsheller a fen days two. I Madison bad no trains Thnrsdayj Tbo snow p'ow came up from Colum) bus at midnight. Tbe drifts art i normous on the country roads,' Two out of four carriers could not; make their trips yesterday and toV 'day. The sobool bouse In Platte Center; was badly destroyed by fire at an only hour Monday. Tbo blaze ii supposed to havo started from thi furnace. Tho town has no fire de) partment and the bucket brigade was In no way able to cope with the '' .uatlon. Tbe loss is $8,000. Five '.acners are out of employment. , A debate took place between tbq Albion and Madison high schools afe the opera bouse in Mudlson on tha question of the government owner ship of railroads. Albion hsd tbe affirmative and Madison the negative or tho question. About 200 people 'wero present. Tho decision was rendered in favor of tho affirmative, i The students of tho Dawson nigh school took advantage of the tine sleighing nnd visited the Stella High school. Farmers report that the Bnow Is nearly two feet deep on the level jn cornstalk fields, and should lit go off with a warm rain in the spring will undoubtedly do muctj idamago to bridges. ' A log house located on tbe Mll4 ranch near Humboldt occupied by Sam Oonover and family was de stroyed fire. It originated in a overheated stove in a room adjoining ,the one In whioh members f the (family were working.