. THE ALLIANCE HERALD, FRIDAY, OCTOBER 21, 1921
t i
RANDOM SHOTS
rerc Cogswell tells of swing a man
? Ta ?m hu"RTy tht he ate bis
cuits just like popcorn.
This talk of equality of the sexes
is ll bunk. A Minneapolis man sued
his wife for divorce and got it, but the
judge denied him alimony.
Another Omaha woman, who was in
a nervous, run-down condition, drag
ging along with one foot in the grave
and the other foot skidding, has been
brought back to life and health and
strength and beauty by a certain
ptent patent medicine. For the first
correct guess forwarded to this office
by registered mail, a prize of our last
summer's straw hat will be awarded.
The potash industry may yet be
favel to western Nebraska. Eminent
Chicago scientists advocate the substi
tution of potash salts for common
table salt, and if the fad should spread,
the plants next door will be kept
running day and night.
' A former Alliance mon on a visit
here last week informed friends that
he has a new accomplishment and
he's only been away from the city for
six or seven months. He now dines
with a brand-new set of "store
toofies."
A new variation of the wheeze:
. "Horatio, get the hammer there's a
flq on baby's head" has come to liirht.
It goes this way: "Dorothy, stop kick
ing the baby in the face those are
your new shoes."
Three or four months ago, an Alli
ance golfer on the home links made a
long drive. The little white ball jump
ed over the fance and went through
the windshield on a Ford car. The
golfer was willing to pay the bill, but
couldn't find the owner of the car and
in time forgot all about it Last week
Harry Gantz and Mike Nolan were
golfing and Mike drove one through
the same fence, and it found a resting
place in a car. This reminded Harry
of the previous occasion, and he told
it. "Great Scotland," said Mike, "I've
been looking for three months for the
fellow who ruined my windshield."
Harry is buying cokes a3 a penalty
lor spilling the beans.
The fellow who imagines he's indis
pensable, even when two or three of
Lis friends tell him so, is making a sad
error.
Marriage, we understand, plays hob
Vmth the golf score.
NINE
The Platte Valley Daily News
(ScottsblutT, of course) simply cannot
understand why Elsie Ferguson should
be so popular in the. east and fall so
flat in the west. Yet the title of her
picture in that city was "Sacred and
Profane Ixve."
Did you give up your photograph In
order to hnvo in ,nloriiiiu.t i
. . -- T- .-. i; iiivriiv 111
jbig exhibition that was never pulled
VII 4
o v VI riUIIC
whatever that is. Presumably, in buy-1
ing a tri-tone on the exhibition plan.
joule iii-m ucKien pinic, ana then feel
blue when you discover you've been
done brown.
, They chucked me in the ammuni
tion wagon when they picked me up!
after the battle," said the returned :
stldier, who was detailing his war
experiences for the benefit of his lady
fair. . i
"You mean the ambulance, don't'
you?" asked his rival, who wished to'
utimie mm.
"No," replied the veteran; "I was
so full of bullets they called the am
munition wagon."
Need for a Klan
Nebraska City Tress: Unless a cer
tain Nebraska Citv mnn. snv n st
In which is written on red paper, stops
calling at a house in a , Respectable
Neighborhood while the Hubo's is'
away, the Ku Klux Klnn is tn ho
out. Now, don't everybody guess at
once.
t
APPLES OF DUST
DRESS MY TOP
The top protects you from
the sun, the rain, and all
other weather.
Now you should protect
x your top. -
Tops cost money, and wear
out fast, but,
Tops can be protected. I
have a dressing of my own
make that will put, and
keep your top in perfect
condition, providing you
bring your car in a couple
of times a season, and let
me give it the once over.
My charges are so small for
this service, -that you can
not afford to let it go an
other day.
When it comes to SERV
ICE soe Al.
ALS AUTO SERVICE
Between Drake Hotel and
Elks Club.
Oh, Boy!
Once upon a time there wa sin inn
in Merle Pngland named the Bull Inn.
Along in the year 1813 fifty-four ilrit
ish soldiers stopped there for five
hours. According to record-, vcvpntiv
discovered the liquid refreshments
served them during these five hours
was as follows: 12G bottles of port, 43
of sherry, 64 bowls of punch besides
innumerable mura nf nfo an, I mnw
which were free of charge and -ere
noi counted in the reckoning.
ELLSWORTH
The funeral of Patrick Welch, who
met death in the auto accident here
faunday night, was held at St Ber
nard's church at 9:30 a. m. WpHnos.
day. Mr. Welch having been born and
raised in this section of the sand hills
was well and favorably known and
many of his hosts of friends were
present at the services in charge of
Father Constant of Alliance. Heartfelt
sympathy go out to the relatives of the
deceased in their hour of sorrow.
Patrick Reid who has been quite ill
the past week is slowly recovering
Mrs. Florence and George Beckler
of Spade received the sad news of the
death of their brother and uncle of
Rochester, N. Y. George left for
Kochester on the night train Monday.
R. O. Haskins, J. R. Williams and
Ted Lechner of Swift & Co., Omaha,
spent the last week hunting at the
Jules Sandoz place near Spade, return
ing to their positions Tuesday. It is
reported that all returned with "the
limit" well pleased with sand hill
hunting and intend to return for an
other outing whenever convenient.
John Schonard who has been sick
with bronchitis is now back on the
job. Albert Arms substituting for the
first trip with, the south mail this
week.
A United States postofTice inspector
found everything in excellent shape at
the local office Tuesday. He left for
the Spade country on the afternoon
trip.
L. J. Munger who shipped cattle to
the Omaha market Saturday returned
Tuesday not very well peased with
the run of the market. Mr. Munger
had some excellent steers which
brought $5.50 and cows sold for $5.35.
It appears that the threatened rail
road strike has caused heavy reecipts
and cattle are down even lower than
before.
P. E. Law, A. Moore and B. F.
Bollinger were among the Alliance
visitors Tuesday and Wedneslay.
Dill ion Donohoe ho has been
working in the eastern part of the
state for teh past year , is home for a
visit.
Marvin Ellsbury is visiting in Alli
ance this week seeking government
medical aid and consultation from dis
ability incurred while he was in the
U. S. navy.
W. I O'Keefe of Alliance and Mr.
McWilliams of state insurance board
of the Mutual Life were Ellsworth
business visitors Wednesday and
Thursday going on by auto to Hyannis
Thursday evening.
Welcome Teachers
TO ALLIANCE
This firm welcomes the vis
iting teachei'3 to the city of
. Alliance and takes this means
of expressing its sincere wish
that they have a pleasant and
profitable visit in our city.
You Are Invited to Coll
at the Keep-U-Neat and become acquainted with our up-to-date
cleaning establishment. Our modern methods
and careful workmanship are at your command, now or in
the future.
Keep-U-Neat
CLEANERS AND TAILORS
Phone 133 207 Dox Butte
By MAUDE 8. HALLAM
0oooOOO4 4
'). 11. by McClur N.wtpap.r Syndickt.
"Seel Seel Monsieur, M.OOO francs
for me; niou IMeu, do you hear, for
me! The little 'Marie will shed no
more tenrs. no more shall she hunger,
no more shall she stand at the wash
tub till she drop., with the little ones
screaming around her. Yes, monsieur!
the (irand Prix lottery. I took the
money she hud put aside for food,
and she. the little Marie, thought li
lost. Ahl how she cried, the petite.
But no more slmll she ween. The
doctor said she must have rest, good
food, change f sir. or she will die.
So I took the money and botight a
share In a lottery ticket, and see what
fortune Is inlye! Fifty tbousnnd
francs 1"
The little mnn. rushed about lm
pnrtlng his good news to all and
sundry, for everyone was willing to
listen to his tide of good luck, most
of them with envy, Mit some well
pleased that It was great. For Jenn
P.errler was one of the unfortunates
with n sick, a dying wife, who hud
struggled and slaved to put bread Into
the months of her hiiHhntid and three
small children ever since he. Jean, fell
from the scaffolding of a building on J
which ne was working and broke his
leg, six months aco struggled and
worked till the little body had sue
Climbed to the strain, and for weeks
she had lain without the strength to
crawl across the floor to the now
empty pnntry.
And to crown her misfortune, the
little hnnrd of francs she had saved
against such a time had mysteriously
disappeared.
No bread had pnssed her llpi for
two .days now, and the little ones
were whimpering with cold and
hunger, while Jean where was he?
Had anything happened to bira?
Never before had he left for so long I
And she was tired, oh, so tired
of waiting for him. It was getting
dark and cold so cold I She would
sleep and forget the cold.
There was a stumbling noise as of a
drunken man coming up the stairs,
then a rush of stronger, swifter foot
steps, and the crippled Jean burst Into
the room. Intoxicated with Joy, . fol
lowed by rejoicing and sympathetic
neighbors and even strangers, brought
by the little man's enthusiasm.
"Ttens! little one I Here are silks,
and satins, horses and carriages, ser
vants and mansions, for you I Whnt!
asleep, little one?" and In spite of his
elation he tiptoed across the room to
the pale, still figure on the rude couch
q still one, could almost fancy ah,
'No! Not that! Merciful heaven.
,not that!
Propped nnheeded was the hng of
gold. Forgotten all the Joy of riches.
Silent the rejoicing neighbor for the
little Matle had passed to the Ilonse
of Many Mansions, through the Gates
of Jssper. the Streets of Gold.
Awestruck and abashed the crowd
pr.ssed slowly from the room, leaving
the stricken linshand three starving,
whimpering children ptteousty crying
for Just a crust of bread and a floor
strewn with glittering gold coins.
WANT ADS FOR HUBBIES
The shortage of men in Vienna has
reached a crucial stage and there are
from three to five columns of adver
tisements in the newspapers every day
placed there by girls who want hus
bands. It is estimated there are ten
girls to every man in Vienna and spe
cific inducements are offered prospect
ive hubands in the ads, which al' w'nd
up with the words, "Object Matri
mony." Herald Want Ads are read.
Wc have just unloaded a
second car of new potato
sacks and we can fill your
order for any amount.
O'Bannon & Ncuswanger.
Dan to be at the Halloween party
on Friday, October 28, at the church.
Presbyterian C E. 03-96
Values Extraordinary
MEN'S SOFT COLLARS
in all styles and sizes,
2 for 25c
2-PIECE FLEECE LINED UNDERWEAR Special at
69c
mi
MEN'S FLANNEL SHIRTS
Priced as low as
$1.50
BOYS' HEAVY FLEECE LINED UNDERWEAR
All Sizes
75c
These Extra Special Values arc but a few that we offer.
THE FAMOU
OF COURSE.
II!:
Cash Buyieg Will Pay Dividends
It is Your Own Fault if You Don't Save Money
On Your Needs.
WE ARE HERE TO SAVE YOU MONEY AND WE DO SO- READ OUR ADS
MEAT DEPARTMENT
FOR SATURDAY
FOR SUNDAY DINNER
BEST POT ROASTS, per lb. . . 10c
Best Round Steak, try this, per lb 17c
Best Pork Chops, per lb ,20c
Fancy Ribbed Roasts, per lb. ...... 12V&C
Beef Boil Brisket, Flank, Rib, 4 lbs. .25c
Best T-Bones, Sirloins, per lb. 22c
Veal Loaf, Weiners, Minced ham, lb. . .20c
Shoulder Roasts, per lb 10c
pork chops ,
best t-bones
best 6hort cuts
20c lb.
WEINERS
MINCED HAM
BOLOGNA
LIVER SAUSAGE
Pure Lard-The Best-per lb 16c . shoulder Roast, per lb 10c
Best Sliced Bacon (The way you
want it) per lb. .35c Best Rib Roasts, per lb .lie
GROCERY DEPARTMENT
PEARS FOR CANNING QUINCES ; NEW DILL PICKLES
Large Loaves Butter Krust Bread, 21 oz. each, 2 for . . .25c
EXTRA GOOD BANANAS, per dozen 25c
Head Lettuce, Celery Green Peppers Tokay Grapes
BEST HIGH PATENT FLOUR $1.75
MORGAN GROCERY CO
