TllhJ AIjLIAMJK HKUALU. Tl KS1MV. NOV KMHKU2, 1920.
Random Shots
HWMWWWMWWHMMHM,
Sam Smiley tins flRUird out liow
Taft can support both the league of
nation and Hardin at the name
time. He says Taft'a support of
Hardin la like the caw or the wo
man who marries a man to reform
tilra.
Oh, well today ends most of the
argument.
Which won't make any of us sore.
Wonder who will win all the elec
tion bets? Del Abe, wins some of
them.
Wonder which side will do the
rowing? After It's all over, we
mean. Both of them are doing a lot
of advance cheerln.
Wonder when the restaurants will
quit charging 5 cents ettra for a side
Hsh of mashed potatoes Spuds are
down less than a dollar a bushel.
Hitch your wagon to a star, If you
feel that way, but keep your feet on
the ground.
Young man at the movies, butting
Interestedly Into the, ear of his lady
' friend. So enthralled was he, that
be didn t notice that bis head was
directly tn front of hers, and that if
Che saw the pictures, her eyes must
bave been able to penetrate solid
Ivory. "Huh," grunted a bachelor.
"He'd save a whole seat If he'd sit
on her lap."
This happened at a meeting of the
ALL SUITS, Including
Our WOOLTEX Label
Closing Out at Absolute Cost
Highland-Holloway Co.
v'ox-Kon-ievc It club: The crowd was
there, twrn y flve or thirty sinn.
laylnsr Hai " d'fnt e w
iptinbllrt.n EntT 0?cnr need, chief
of nil Ihffl copn. "Now we're all here,"
an Id OHoar, "don't ynu think It stmut
time to take' a straw vote tn the
presidency."
Oxrar has it about figured out that
he republicans followed Ibis meth.
od. Pick your crowd, and the straw
vote will always turn out satisfact
orily. " r
In Kamchatra, we read with In
terest, It Is possible to get drunk on
toadstools. Somebody better tip off
(Sus lljers, so that he run be pre
pared to arrest toadstools tn sight.
Somehow, rather than eat toad
toil to get a kick, we'd rather stay
sober.
There are limits, you know.
Ole Buck: Men candidates , have
always made a hit with the mothers
by kissing the babies. A Harvard
woman says when she runs for office
he H goitiK to offset that vote by
kissing the daddies. There will be
some real excitement when that cam
paign gets under way.
"She's the most fortunate girl,"
sighed one of the lady boarders.
"They say he is an only son, and he
has had a hope client for ten years.
It has the most beautiful things in
it."
A man with a nope enest shucks,
that Isn't out of the way. Didn't a
man win one at the last church
raffle 7
We'll bet the brlde.to-be appre
ciates it as much as we do.
Todfty n Ife-st Story.
," 'So you attend Sunday school
regularly? the minister said to little
Eve.
" 'Oh, yes, sir.'
" 'And you know your Bible?"
" 'Oh, yes, sir.
" "Could you perhaps tell me
something that Is In It?"
' 'I could tell you 'evtvthlng
that's In It.'
" indeed. And the tnlnlKtT smil
ed. Do tell me, then.'
" 'Sister's beau's photo is In It.'
said little Eve promptly, 'and ma's
recipe for vanlshln' cream is in it,
and a lock of my hair cut off when I
was a baby is in it, and the ticket for
pa's watch Is in It.' "
t'urtln "Host" Hour and com
meal. O' Itanium & NeiiMwanger. 07
1,1 KH SOME OlKiAMZATIONS.
Two sailors at a dog show were
gaiing at a valuable Skye terrier,
which had so much hair that it look
ed more like a woolen mat than a
dog.
"Which end Is 'is 'cad. Tom?"
attked one.
"Blowed If I know," was the re
ply, '"ere, I'll stick a pin in him, and
you look which end barks." Good
Hardware.
Ht5l tVtK MAUt
STATES MRS. BRAND
Want Other to Know How TanfnY
Ovvrt'ome Her Itlie timat Ikiii
And Indigestion.
"Tanlac has proved such a bless-
to me that I Just want other suffi rers
to know about It." declared Mrs.
Mary A. Brand, of 120 West Second
street, Des Moines, la.
"For five years," continued Mrs.
Brand, " I was in mighty bad health,
shortly after eating anything my
stomach would hurt until the pain
became almost unbearable. Gas
pressed against my heart, causing it
to palpitate dreadfully, and when I
exerted myself In any way I Just had
to fight for breath.
"I had awful headaches and dizzy
That the profiteering landlord
makes reds Is the charge of protest
tng tenants, but little that worries
the profiteering landlord so long as
he makes the money.
Curtis "Ilent" Hour and corn
menl. O'llannon & Neuswanger. 97
It has been discovered that the
poet Burns required a big hat. But
then not everybody who requires a
big head measurement comes so
honestly by it.
Farmers' wealth is computed like
that of the dentists. The money they
make depends on the numbers of Bett
ers they work on.
spells, and my nerves Vfts runs.
t suffered from rheumatism my
right arur and tn my ankles, anu f
times I could scarcely raise my hand
above my head. I was restless,
couldn't get enough sleep, and got up
In the mornings feeling miserable.
"After reading about Tanlae I de
rided to try It, and I can eat any
thing I want, even beans and onions,
and not be bothered With Indigestion.
I no longer suffer front fcas on my
stomach, and am free from dullness,
headaches, palpitations and short'
ness of breath. The rehumatlsnt
pains are entirely gone, and my
nerves are steady and normal again.
I sleep fine, and get up in the morn
ings feeling refreshed and full of
energy."
Tanlac Is sold In Alliance by F.
E. Holsten, In Hemingford by Hem
ingford Merc. Co., in Hoffland by
Mallery Grocery Co.
One nhudders at fhe thought, but.
what would happen to' rhe publicity
market If Iwn film tn-
i, - "w Kia,o . I in A cut
"' divorce at the same time?
Afctatlon Js rlf in the west for a
six-hour 4ay which would hardly
give sufficient leisure to denounce re
sulting advance in prices.
When a man marries for money
he seeks a good figure more than a
pretty face. ,
Miss Swanson of Sedalla, Mo., Is
visiting Mrs. B. M. Scotten.
CLOSING OUT
Wotaen's & Children's Hats
Regardless of Cost
Highland-Holloway Co.
CLOSING OUT
Women and Children's Hats
Regardless of Cost
Highland-Holloway Co.
i
fji Highest Possible JJjty at Lowest Possible Price
Here
you "Know 'It -All"
ONCE in a while we run across a man whojsays,
"Aw, they don t make cigarettes like they used
to one's as gooJ a another now-a-days."
All right, we'll give that smoker any kind of odds he
wants on Spur and win hands down.
Perhaps you are looking for that gooJ old-time to
bacco taste. Spurs are chock full of it. Couldn't help
but be, with that jim-dandy blend of choice Turkish,
fine Burlcy and other home-grown tobaccos.
Light up a Spur take a long puff and quicker than
you can say "Jack Robinson" you will jump for a scat
on the Spur band wagqn.
Spurs have another surprise for you they're
crimped, not pasted. No other cigarette is rolled with
the crimped scam, and you benefit by easier drawing,
longer burning, better taste.
And here's extra measure three-fold package of
rich brown and silver to keep Spurs fresh and fragrant.
No use dodging Spurs meet you at every turn.
Liuorrr tf Myers Tobacco Co.
areue
Man, uhat a tonJerul toUiixo ra
graru t is rafted up to you as you cut open
the ctH'trs of the new Spur tin. Fifty
dinetteskept fresh vacuum sealed.
tr r i r it . .7
A Checking Account Is
Your Greatest Measure
of Defense
Defend yourself against waste Cash is rarely seen save at the vanishing point. It
dwindles, it scatters you know not where. But you THINK when you write a
check. You have a record of where the money rocs. Payments are systematized,
expenditures reduced. -ttj
A checking account protects you against loss of your money by fire, theft, carelessness,
forgetfulness. It means your funds aresafe.
Defend yourself against trickery and mistake File your checks. They make indisputable
receipts, sparing you twice payment of of bills, for on the back of every cancelled
check which comes back to you is the signature of the person or the firm which re
ceived the money.
build n fortress against sickness, accident and old age You save a surplus and it will
save you sometime. And remember, bythe way, that writing more deposit tickets
than checks is the secret of both safetyand sucess.
Ward off the inconvenience and worry Achecking account in our bank ranks with
free mail delivery and the telephone. It saves you a long trip, and you always have
the right to change. Your money is always available, payable on demand. No
expense we supply check books, passbooks and all necessary stationary free.
FIRST NATIONAL BANK
Alliance, Nebraska
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X
ffiplqrine
MOTOR
OILS
RIUMM On COMMff
Properly Oiled Motors Purr
Those lubricated with. Polarine invariably run smoothly
and quietly. When fine bearing surfaces are "filmed" with
the finest oil, the squeaks, rattles and wear of friction are
practically nil.
Polarine is made by the most up-to-date refining methods
the result of over half a century of experience and re
search. It is efficient every season of the year. Does not
thicken in autumn and winter, or "wear" thin during a
long trip.
To meet the requirements of all makes of cars and trucks,
Polarine is made in four grades, differing in body but not
in quality. These grades are
Polarine
Polarine Medium Heavy
Polarine Heavy
Polarine Extra Heavy
For winter use lh? Polarine r.nd Polarine Medium Heavy
grades are recommended.
For full mileage and power, use Red Crown gasoline- the
standard motor fuel. It is just as dependable and uniform
as Polarine. At Red Crown service stations and author
ized dealers everywhere.
STANDARD OIL COMPANY
(Nebraska) ,
I if 55
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