TUB ALLIANCE HERALD, TUESDAY, MARCH 9, 1920.
TWO
BALD & RUST LAND CO. Successors to Thomas-Bald Investment Co.
Comment-and
Discomment
11 ui rejoice ana oe exceeaing
glad nay, tickled to death. One of
the worst offenders in the world has
reformed. No, dear readers, little
Boilerplate Dennle has not quit back
biting it's better news than that
from the standpoint of this partic
ular publisher. Bennie succeeds In
Advertising The Herald, although
be'a not on our payroll, and he has
earned our eternal gratitude. He
baa helped bring a real newspaper
intn man homes where once The
Semi-Weekly Scrapbook held sway
Long may he bluster and loudly may
be roar. We need the advertising,
We are referring to the decision
.of a large publicity bureau to Btop
Attemnta to sponge free advertising
It would surprise a good many of
cur readers if they had any Idea of
the Imnienfu? sums that are spent
ach month to secure space in news
papers without pnylng coin of the
realm for it. Literally dozens of
letters arrive each week some
marViA "Personal." others labeled
'Important." and many "News Mat
Tiimh " And all of them lK
the same weet song. Thoy tell o
their net project nncl attempt to
prove conclusively that thetr pet
cheme is tho most important thtnK
in the world.
Some of these space moochers go
farther than merely sending u
mimeographed news , letters. They
have plates made of their junk, so
the publisher won t have to sei
up. Then, some day when news is
scarce, the makeup man may grab l
mnA Put it in the columns. These
people pay the men and women wh
write this slush good salaries. They
pay the man who makes the plates
bis legitimate profit. They pay the
xpress company real money to have
it brought to the printer but they
try to tell the printer that he ought
to publish it without charge. And
lota of them get away with it.
an tnnff n real news although not K
for publication.
2. Thanks for your prompt re
sponse and your Interest. Replies to
our questionnaire show an almost
unanimous verdict that the paper
waste is appalling. Based on slight
ly less than a thousand replies from
papers ranging In circulation rrom
the 350.000 city daily to the 800 a
week fellow in the rural districts,
the composite answer is:
How much free publicity are you
receiving in the dally mans an
sourcesT Boxes, barrels, carloads.
How much of it are you using?
One-half of 1 per cent by volume.
How much of it is put up in news
paper shape so as to require no edit
ing or ro-writlng? Two and seventy-
five hundredths per cent by welgnt.
How much of it has news value?
Now and then we find a raisin in it.
Remarks (if any). There should
be another Volstead act for the sup
pression of near and unpaid pub-
lfcrlty. G-r-r-r-I ! t ! I-lke
Wlse d n. Waste is criminal.
Some of- the most palpable offenders
are movies, presidential candidates,
financial institutions, relief organ
izations paying high salaries to sup
posed space grafters. Hearty con
eratlntlons on your good Bcnse in
cutting out some of it.
3. And so, with these few re
marks, and after turning iu our dark
lantern, our gum goloshes, our false
face and our skeleton keys, we re
nounce membership In the Space
Grubbers' Union and will endeavor
to lead an honest, straightforward
life hereafter.
4. But listen. Now and then, not
often mind you, when you get In the
mails a colored envelope such as en
closes this memorandum, open it up,
for it will contain some 100 proof
stuff that was smuggled in through
the vast sea of useless words. It'll.
be that kind of we won't send it out.
J. T. CONRAD.
Chief, Recruiting Publicity.
r
There is, of course, a little rift
within the lute. You noticed, Just
The first bureau of this sort to
publicly reform is the recruiting pub
licity bureau .or the United States
army, with headquarters at New
York City. For months we have
.been getting from two to five letters
a week from these people short
ones, thank heaven containing a
brief wrlteup. To be.fair, their stuff
-was better than gome, but at that
nine-tenths' of it was without a
gleam of interest. We have not
.found a single line of it worthy of
a place in The Herald. We're more
particular about what we set before
our readers than some folks.
Ten days ago, this bureau sent out
A questionnaire. We came nearly
throwing it into the wastebasket, as
usual, but inasmuch as it was sealed,
we had curiosity enough to open It
It Jarred us, this questionnaire, be
cause of the way it was worded. It
asked questions that we had often
asked ourselves, and, hoping that
.some interesting figures would be
.compiled, we filled her out and sent
her in. Today the answer arrived.
and it is even more startling.
The envelope had a broad band of
red across the front, with the bro-
mldic words "Real News" engraved
In block letters. And it was real
news. Read these words, reader,
and weep as we wept for sheer
Joys-
as we did, that tho writer said that
onco in a wnne ne d send some
"real news" to us. We believe he
means It we want to believe, as the
sinner said but we've been gold-
brlcked so often.
And now, if tho Y. M. C. A., th-
U. S. Navy, the Interchurch World
Movement,-the Non-Partisan league,
the Unite States Grain corporation,
the rershlng-for-Presldent gang, the
tire manufacturers, the institute of
American meat packers, the Univer
sity of Nebraska, the livestock com
mission men and a couple of him
dred. other societies will only quit
sending us columns of drivel, we
could stand the effort of throwing
the rest of them in the waste basket
without endangering our eternal salvation.
MEMORANDUM: For All Editors.
Subject: Our Questionnaire, 2-21-20.
Reference: Your Answer.
1. For a very good reason, this is
Get us right we don't object to
printing free publicity dope that has
a gleam of Interest in it for our
readers, or that has news value. If
it possesses these two essentials, we
don't mind rewriting it to make the
words track rightly. We're glad to
accept news itsems of local value,
and we welcome, now and then, a
contribution on other subjects of
general interest when an Alliance
man writes it. But, we can promise
you this boilerplate and grapevine,
unless especially timely and remark
ably interesting, so long as the pres
ent owners conduct The Herald, wllJJ
be forever barred. This newspaper
is na scrapbook.
Firemen Uleman and Shoafatall
are off duty, being sick.
Jack Phillips went to Chicago Sat
urday night to attend to personal
business,
True Economy
We Cleqn,
Press and
Repair Men
and Women's
CLOTHING
Clothing sent to this shop for
Dry Cleaning or Pressing always
gets the same careful attention
whether It be a hurry-up order or
one on which we have plenty of
time.
KEEP-UtNEAT
CLEANERS, TAILORS & DYERS
207 BOX BUTTE PHONE 133
Coming direct from the Auditorium, Denver. Guaranteed to
be the best attraction ever in Alliance.
ANNOUNCEMENT EXTRAORDINARY!
To the Theatre and Musical Patrons of Alliance and Vicinity
The Management of the
Imperial
Theatre
Desires to thank the patrons of this city and vicinity for the liberal patronage and hearty
co-operation that has enabled us to bring the better class of entertainment to this city,
and to announce that under a liberal guarantee arragenments have been completed to
present an
O V K It A FESTIVAL
TWO NIGHTS
Sunday and Monday, Mar. 21-22
The Ralph Dunbar Presentation
of America's Best Loved and Greatest Comic Opera
ROBIN HOOD
By Reginald DeKoven and Harry B. Smith
With the Complete All-Star Cast of Leading American Operatic Artists
Large Chorus of Boys and Girls that really sing-. Guaranteed the best ensemble chorus en-tour. Splendid Orchestra of
Symphony Players including Leading Members from both St. Louis and Minneapolis Symphony Orchestras.
Same Lavish Scenes and Mechanical Display as used during the Four Months Run at the Park Theatre, New York City.
A Few of the Members of This Superb Organization v
Lorna Doona Jackson, Phcnominal Contralto. New Orleans Opera Company.
Stella Thomas, Prima Donna Soloist. Arthur Pryor's Band.
Elsie Tedic, Soprano, Metropolitan, New York.
Kathrinc Callaway, Original Star. "Have a Heart."
Marie Baker, Original "Princess Pat."
Albert Parr, Tenor. Metropolitan, New York. "Robin Hood" with last continental
tour Bostonians.
James McSweeney, Original Friar Tuck with Bostonians. Now playing original role.
Ed Andrews, Original Koka of Mikado fame.
George Dogan, Bass. Century Opera Company.
Soul Solomon, Comedian, London Opera Company.
And Others.
ORCHESTRA UNDER DIRECTION OF VALENTINE, METROPOLITAN, NEW YORK
Special to Our Patrons:
Although there are no financial returns to be made by the Theatre Management dur
ing this engagement owing to the guarantee necessary to bring this excellent attraction
here, still we are well repaid in the knowledge that we are giving the people of Alliance
the best musical attraction of the present season.
PRICES: $1.50, $2.00, $2.50
Subscription and mail orders now received when accompanied by remittance and
self-addressed envelope. INCLUDE WAR TAX.
Address all letters to Manager Imperial Theatre
Box office sale opens March i5th at Holsten's Drug Store
NOTE Owing to the capacity business played to everywhere by this attraction, no
tPlPtihone orders will be received. No seats laid away, and we wish to impress on our patrons
the necessity of prompt reply for mail orders so that you may aecure the choice locations.
TO OUT OF-TOWN PATRONS: A special block of seats are being held for out of-
Wrihpra and seats will be filled in the order received.
THIS WILL POSITIVELY BE THE SOCIETY MUSICAL EVENT OF THE SEASON
THE HERALD WANTOLuM GETS RESULTS. TRY THEM