SUBSCRIPTION ORDER
191.
Tb Alliance Herald.
Alliance. Nebraska.
Gentlemen: T JJ
You may enter my subscription to Th Alliance Herald for a period
"IF THK MIOK KITS tlN)-
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1 ' ' ii SaV l IBB v
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Remarks
Name
By
Street or T. O, Hon
Town
State
Start Now
To Make Your Tire Equipment
W ML 79 JKm.
BEGIN NOW by getting a Fisk for your
spare rim. Thousands of today's users
of complete Fisk equipment began years
ago with the purchase of a single tire. Ex
perience proved to them that the famous
risk Non-Skid is the greatest dollar-fordo
liar tire value on the market and the
standard of Fisk Quality is higher today
than ever.
Fitk Tire$ For Sale By
KEELER COURSEY CO.
112-114 East 3rd Street
ALLIANCE, NEBRASKA
-By
ADAM LIAR
Winn Cod finished Mlklllf the
reptiles, toads, liz.urds and all the
other vile and low animals he had
some awful substance left an aw
ful substance too vile to be used by
;d in making life. So the devil
secured it. and straightway the devil
shaped the suhstance into a UMgUC
and placed it into the moyth of a
numan wim instructions io use u
mailt iously in spreading gossip.
Since that time this awful speciman
of humanity has been breeding reg
ularly until ut the present time every
city, town and village has some of
the offspring. Alliance along wills
the rest.
o
Yes. Alliance has the gossip. My
attentio nhas been called in particu
lar to one gossip in the form of a
woman who persists in using her
tongue in the usual vile manner. My
informant tells me that in a numss'i
of instances her tongue has "got her
In bed." He also says that he has
in w evidence against her, and unless
she Immediately doses her trait fetid
discontinues her attempt to spread
malicious lies with an attempt at de
faming character she can expect one
of two things either a criminal li
bel suit, or a suit for damages for
malicious Blander. In view of the
fact that she is worth a considerable
amount In real property, a damage
suit might be carried out with con
siderable success.
Apollo is said to be the first gen
tleman who ever struck a lyre. If
he had only hit him a little harder
we might not have so many magnif-
icvnt liars at the present time.
o
The gink that worked in front of
the three-legged-girl show at the
carnival here last week came into
the otlice Saturday night and bought
u paper. His real purpose was to
find a scrap. He found it. He
started .out by yelling at the man
who was in the office, "What ya
wanta pick on a poor widow woman
with a daughter born with three legs
and two bodies, who is trying to
make a livin gfor herself and four
other children? What ya wanta
mix her up with a lota hootchey
dancers and brods for? Ya talk
about unpaved Ilox Butte avenue-
why ure dirtier and lower than the
hugs in the street 1 he people all
over town are laughing at you.
You're a fool. 1 knowed a fellow in
Wisconsin who ran a paper where he
talked like you did and they follow
ed him with slow music. If I was I
hon e guard I'd come down here and
beat the brains out of you." But
he didn't beet any brains out or in.
Somehow he seemed to be under the
impression that the air was purer
outside, and beat it.
Talk about buving papers I
guess every man and woman con
nected with that carnival outfit
bought a paper. Some bought four
or six. (Josh, thev about cleaned
out the edition at five cents each.
Wonder if they'll have it framed or
use it instead of tissue paper? One
of them said he wasn't buying the
paper to read, he was buying It ,
well, it was an old one he pulled
there. -
-
Monday morning I was crossing
unpaved Box Butte avenue and hap
pened to look down. I thought 1
had discovered where someone had
been drilling for oil. Have you no
ticed those nice big holes all along
the Street where I lie tlYc-t'nnt tOtli
poles were driven? And tacks
Harry DuBuque picked up llfteen,
and a docen others got their share.
Automobile owners are still donating
to the garage men for new Innei
tubes as a result.
u
A local doctor says that he had an
exceedingly long patient who said to
him: "I say, doctor, are you going
to put that plaster on my feet to
draw the pain from my head?"
"Yes, why?" replied the doctor.
"Well," observed the long patient,
"I'd rather have it where it is than
drawn down through six feet and
one inch of new territory."
The Old Fashioned Girls In Patriotic Program
JTv Jf
THIS CHARMING COMPANY GIVES AN APPROPRIATE PATRIOTIC PROGRAM, RENDERING SONGS AND
STORIES OF THE SIXTIES.
Tuneful Darkies In Two Great Programs at Chautauqua
1 ft J P
' n
oft P
aHBN 'B
aTBaeasssaaai i mmm in in .- H Nm , '
th
sa y .
you
ever
TWO women were talking at
post office. I heard one of them
"Wouldn't you like to know if
are the tirst one that
loved?" To which the other re
plied, "No, I'd rather be certain that
I m the last one.
o
It happened at a local hoarding
house this week. One of the gentle
man hoarders suggested to the land-
idy that he wished she wouldn't
make such affectionate pies. The
landlady couldn't "get" him. and
said. "Affectionate pies! Pray, what
kind's that?" "Why this berry pie's
so thin that the crusts are actually
stuck on each other," he replied.
-o
I'm still in the market for ideas.
If you have a good one shoot it
ilong. It will be taken care of, you
may be sure.
LIVE STOCK PRICES
AT SOUTH OMAHA
Fit Cattle Stow - Weak to
10c-15c: Lower
H06S SELL k DIME HIGHER
Very Llmittd Receipts of Sheep and
Lambs and a Slow, Uneven Market.
Lamb Prices Shew a Somewhat
Lower Tendency, While Aged Sheep
Are Quotably Steady.
Union Stock Yards. South Oiuaha,
July 3. 1D17. i'attle receipts wore
fairly liberal for the opening day of
the week, about BO0 head, ami near
ly a third of these were Pacific coast
Kraswers. The market was slow, weak
to IO& l.V lower than the close
of last week, best heavy beeves bring
ing 118.10 and hunt of the yearlings
$12.80, Mraaa cattle were dull ami
decidedly lower and so were cows and
heifers. Business in stock cattle and
feeding steers was light and the
trend of allies down.
(Quotations on cattle Good to
Choice beeves, Jl-.''' UW0I fair to
good beeves, $ 1 1 ..'rtl jj 1 U.'Jfj ; common
to rair beeves, tS.TAfJllJM); good to
choice yearliugs, $12.00918.00; fair
to good yearlings, l i 'a i i - . com
mon lo fair cal lings, i'- .'i'fl 1" 78 ;
good to choice heifers. $lo.0O 11 .00 ;
good to choice cows. $m.!Soj 0.80 ; fair
to good COWS, $7 .''; S .'' tinners
ami cutters. X.VOOfc ".."si : veal calves,
$10,004) 18JI0 ; beer bulls. j..v) lo.on ;
bologna bulls. $.Y.".o.K.lSl ; good to
Choice feeders. $M.7.,!.."it ; fair to
good reeders. $7.7"X.."0 good to
choice Blockers, ftiQ0a50; rair to
good stackers, $7..o($..ro ; comsson to
fair grades. $.7r.7..'0 : stuck heif
ers, $8,0049 UJM); stock cows. $7.u9
tu: stock csives. 7.."'...Vi.
A 10c Advance On Hoge.
The run of bogn whs couiparMilvely
light, about 4.000 head, aiid with a
vigorous demand from both packers
and shippers the market was sctivo
ni.it fully a dime higher iIihu Satur
dajTi Tops brought (15.29 and Ihe
bulk ef ihe trading was around
14.StHaf1.V10. on ihe previous MoeV
day ihe top wss $l..ttO mid the bulk
or the trading around $M.lSfjf l.'. rio.
Lower Market for Lambs.
Although supplies or sheep sod
lambs were light for the opening day
of Ihe week, iihoill '.NSI liesil. tile
puckers were apparently ht anxious
for Ibein and the tr.lnl of vsllles wss
lower. Heel nmlve lamh sold at
I1T4MM917.10 Aged ahecp were
scar end Bvaerully steady,
QuMtatheta on sheep and lsmtj
horn. hmuh. J I :.'' ifi 1 1 ;
heev; . ststC n
iiri ivaj 17 A; spwai
IVJ " 't I5.IMI : b'luli
w It' rv
shtea
l.sntl
latuhs slutrH,
spring hteihe,
la !(. etilhv
feed s. t
sheen i J0O i v.'.tsi:
tllliSjtfi tn.7" : ' s.
iiIIh, shorn. $tUH
ir leg.
ure
I.
THI FAMOUS PiSK JUBILEE SINGERS HAVE SUNG THEMSELVES INTO THE HEARTS OP HUNDREDS
uirrnoiiA AUDIENCES AND ACHIEVED GREATNESS AS ENTERTAINERS.
Hcoi in Extraordinary.
"It's a bra." man who always lakes
h's wife.- adflcaV' sgyp Ihe Albany
Kt'rkeibocker Prss. Ui.t for ilimu-ri-!;t
deaperete l.e'om ie us laVH
.n srhe refitaea t folloat it.
NKU WOMAN Kll XiV A.KT
Madison county is to have a wom
an county agent, the scrond in Ne
braska A County llomemakers'
Aaaociallon with a membership of
more thei ISO count t women has
been formed to assume local direc
tion of the county agent's work. The
aoterprtaa is a co-oyuWWve auauge
ment between thektlnited Statea de-
! Hot Water Each Morning
I Puts Roses in Your Cheeks
- jjjjj ' I
To look one's best and feet one's best
is to enjov sn inside bath each morning
to flush from the system the previous
day's waste, sour fermentations and poi
sonous toxins Lefote it is sbsorbed into
the blood. Just as coal, when it burns,
leaves behind a certain amount of in
combustible material in the form of
ashes, so the food and drink taken each
day leave in the alimentarv organs a
certain amount of indigestible material,
which if not eliminated, form toxins and
poisons which are then sucked into the
blood through the very ducta which are
intended to suck in only nourishment to
sustain the body.
If you want to see the glow of healthy
bloom in your cheeks, to see your skin
get clearer and clearer, you are told to
drink every morning upon arising, a
class nrhot wster with a teaspoonTul
of limestone phosphate in it. which is a
barm leas means of washing the waste
mstenai and toxins from the stomach,
fiver, kidneys and bowels, thus elea.no-
ing, sweetening and purifying the entire
sllmentsry trsct, before putting more
food into the stomach.
Girls and women with sallow skins,
liver spots, pimples or pallid complex
ion, also titose who wake up witn a
coated tongue, bad taste, nasty breath,
others who are bothered with headaches,
'bilious spells, acid stomach or constipa
tion should begin this phosphsted hot
water drinking and are assured of very
pronounced results in one or two weeks.
A quarter pound of limestone phos
phate costs very little at the drue store
but is sufficient to demonstrate that just
as soap anu no wwer cleanses, punnev
and freshens the ekin on the outside, so
hot water and limestone phosphate act
on the Inside organs. We mutt always
consider that internal sanitation is vast
ly more important than outside cleanli
ness) because the skin pores do not ab
sorb impurities into the blood, while the
bowel pores do.
Women who desire to enhance the
beeuty of their complexion should just
try this for a week and notice results.
King's Corner
The Old Budweiser Corner
SELLING ALL THE LEADING
Soft Drinks and Beverages
BEVERAGES ON DRAFT AT ALL TIMES
Order a case of 36 pints
i
L
CO -:'r:.:::l
sent to your home. De
livery made, anywhere in
Alliance. Rebate for re
turn of case.
CIGARS, TOBACCO, CANDY, LUNCHES
King's Corner
JOHN HODGKINSOtf, Mgr.
Distributing Agents for BnlepM't Bottling Works
pertinent of agriculture, the Auricul
tur.il Extension Service of the Uni
versity of Nebraska, and the Home
makers' Association. Funds for the
support of the work are provided by
the government and the local asso
ciation. Miss Louise Meredith, of
the home economics extension serv
ice of the university, has been ap
pointed county agent. She began
work July 1.
ROOtlJHJ OCT OATS AMI WHKAT
Where barley is present in oats,
it may prove practical to "ronue out"
barley plants from a few acres of the
field so as to secure a barley-free
plat as a SOUree of seed next year.
However, if there is too much barley
in the field, it may be desirable to
purchase barley-free seed, as the
cost of removing the barley plants
will be too fcreat. Kye should also
be removed from a few acres of
wheat in the same way, as it has
been found that the market discrim
inates against wheat that contains
more than per cent of rye Re
cently, when samples of mixed grains
were submitted to Minneapolis min
ers, wheat containing 1 per cent of
rye was discounted 1 to : cents a
bushel. Millers usually refuse to
buy wheat that contain- more then 1
per cent of rye.
Mr. Business Man. n vour nei
trip take along aonie artistically
printed business cards. The eipenf
a iliev are business getters
The Herald's job printing edpart
ment will turn ineiu itu iiui.i
Phone 340 and we will call
I'ltOIH 4'K A
THANKS.
' I I N .
t Hit KI-'N
Thore is still time to produce a
four-pound roaster for Thanksgiv
ing, accordlni to poattri husbandry
peclnlista at the Nebraska univer
sity Farm, who are urging inifwiw
production of poultry to meet trie
world's demand for meat, siimuu
every farmer of the slate ('lien are
130.000 fanners :i .Mmv.sha, woo
produce M t'er cent of the pottltr)
out inn for Nebraska) set oae more
b. n with 1". batch 10 healthy
clucks, and raise I .f Ihem lbs si
recat production would b more
than a million chickens weigh.. iu
four million pounds, or nearly one
four-pound chicken for every man
wo. nan and child in Nebraska.
Caillnf cards tor the ladles ar
printed promptlv and neatly at Tb.
Herald offlce The prices are r.sr ,
0Dable Phone 340 for samples sn'
prices, or ealV t tne oalee.
The Bell
Telephone Policy
We endeavor to conduct
our dealings with the public,
our employees and our In
vestors along the lines of this
policy :
1. To furnish courteous,
efficient, and dependable
telephone aervlce.
S. To tell the public the
truth about our business.
S. To be conservative and
economical in the inin
agement of our affairs.
4. To pay our employees
good wages.
B. T earn for our secur
ity bidders a reaaonuhlo
return uu their Investment.
We believe that such suc
cess us we have bad Is be
aue our business has been
conducted along these linea.
nBBBsV M
W. saHCsV V