Nebraska Newspapers

    MENACE OF TILE AIRSHIP.
T77Y1
i ' ti
DAKOTA CXTX, TIER.
v I
v '
&JJ -'OV .aft m
POIIN IL REAM, - PabUslier
Dakota County Herald
v 4
Tho ninn who is found out never has
pood opinion of detectives.
Mary Garden says there Is no mor
ality In clothes. And very 111 I !r econo
my, she might liavo added.
A man's hut will almost always do
for another year; Imt a woman's will
ot do for another mhuitp.
Klngdon Could I? director of a rail
road at 22. This ought to allow him
to retire rom business at Hip advancpd
age of 30.
A St. Louts man wants n divorce be
cause his wife forced hlin to oat pie
With a fork. Who says a woman can
not le cruel?
One prophet predicts the end of (he
Tvorld for July 10. Hut this should not
Interfere with arrangements for a snfo
and sane Fourth.
Tliere Is to hp an increase of a cent
pnpkage In the price of cigarettes.
This la almost sure to produce another
ware of pessimism.
The Sultan of Turkey having lost
one of his many wives, the mathemati
cal sharps are trying to figure out Just
how mnrh of a widower he is.
Perhaps the Inventor of that new
Won't-tlp-over airship has hoen study
ing the principle on which the humble
house cat. always lands right side up.
Scientists are now measuring the
"horse-power" of the humiia body. It
may soon happen that the old phrase
Btrong as a horse" will no longer bo
allowable.
Instead of trampling a child under
Ills horse's hoofs King Alfonso actually
made his steed. avoid It. Hence ho is
hailed as the niost wonderful person
that Spain ever heard of.
When the German Emperor uses the
telephone, he opens the conversation
ylth "I command" except when he
phones the Imperial helpmeet that hc
U bringing home two friends to dinner.
Caruso the tenor Is greatly worried
because a fortune teller has informed
him that he will lose his voice. She
must have been nn amateur fortune
teller. It Is the mission of experienced
fortune tellers to make only encourag
ing predictions.
The, following sentence," says a let
ter to the New York Sun, "Includes
very letter of the alphabet, with only
a V and V repeated: 'A quick
lirown fox Jumps over the Jnr.y dog.'"
Which is quite true, except that the V
and 'r are repeated also.
Cougars, coyotes aud bears are ter
rorizing the Inhabitant of the Four
teenth Ward in Seattle, but this wiM
tot cause any surprise to Europeans
Who believe bison continue to roam
the streets of luffu!o and that Chicago
U a frontier settlement whero the men
trear leather breeches and curry Lonte
knives.
Arrangements are making In Moscow,
with the consent of the government, to
publish a complete edition of the writ
ings of Tolstoi. This Is one of tbq, re
sult of the Itusslan revolution that be
gan a few years ago and la still n
progress. Time was when much that
Tolstoi wrote was not allowed to cir
culate In his native country.
Little Incidents crop out now aud
then which make one smile nt the old
idea of tho mentul Incapacity of wom
ejl. In one New Englund college, to
students attained gutiicleut rank In
scholarship to win thu I'M Beta Kappa
ey, and nine of them were young wom
en. The dean said that the rank of
the men In tho class was perfectly sat
isfactory, but, as one of tho Btndents
put It, "Tho sharks for study wero al
among the girls."
The necessity for a reorganization o'
th medical corpn of the army hns
heen the subject of discussion for some
time, and many reforms have been sug
gested by those most competent to nd
Tlse, Too little attention lias been ac
corded, while pence reigns, to this less
picturesque but equally vital part of
the notion's soldiery. In thu ordinary
duties of tho army thero is nothing to
make manifest the requirements for a
thoroughly trained and supplied medi
cal department. Hut let active hostili
ties begin and the army be til prepared
to tend the sick and wounded, and we
should then see wherein we had failed
to perfect the medical service.
A boa, clergyman declared receutly
that the way he got through his work
was by violating most of the precepts
be hud been taught In boyhood, fore
jrost among them. "If you wHiit any
thing done, do It yourself." The house
keeper mny take a leaf from his book.
For example, the task which she turns
Tr to her daughter lightens her own
bands and trains those of the little
maiden. 'J he most fatal precept for
"mother" to observe Is. "Whatever is
worth doing at all, Is worth doing
well" that Is, If "well" U Interpreted
to mean "as well as you can do It."
Here Is a place for her to use that
Judgment which comes so high In t'he
markets of the world ami M loo of leu
be!i so cheap in the home. "As well
poMlble" is none too well when the
task Is making nn npp pie or ladling
a potato: but the woman who dust
her house from attic ti liar every
day as well as she can do It lack a
sense of proportion. So doe-i she who
Anrnn a pair of twcnfy-ilvc-ccui sl'sk-
lngs a half -hour a wevk for three
months. "A penny saved is a penny
earned" Is another dangerous nmxlin,
nidi si It Is iidinluUl -red with discre
tion. Cheap milk may lisvolxe large
dixlor's Mils. I 'heap egs may mean
an deniable pudding. A bov wage In
the kitchen amy curry with It waste
far beyend Its earing Uomea an
learning that being a womnn demands
some knowledge of almost every suts
Jert ef modern economic Inquiry, and
that It Is no longer possible to trust all
the useful prcvpts of the pnst to solve
the problems of tho present.
"All this talk," snld the old-fashioned
gentleman, "of retting forward t'.ia
date of the President's Inauguration
to April ,'10 seems out ef nhice to me.
The Interval between the popular elec
tion and linuigurntlon Is long enough
now. Why do some people want the
date changed? To Insure better weather
to afford nn opportunity for display
and U give everybody concerned a
'corking' time. "Hut the inauguration
o a chief magistrate should be a high
and solemn ceremonial and not an oc
casion for extravagant display.
Whether It should lie a time for gen
eral rejoicing depends. Itejolilng Is
not a compliment to the outgoing Pres
ident. The Incoming President Is to
lc trlfd. He faces sobering responsi
bilities, ond the people with lilm face
perplexing uncertainties. All this would
S'Piu to mark the day us a day for
fasting nnd prayer rnther than for
dancing nnd Jubilation." Thoe mny bo
old-fashioned notions, but are they so
far astray? Tor the heavy duties that
lie beforo the new President It would
seem that. a solemn scene In the Senate
chamber, before the high dlgnltnrles of
the nation, and then quiet for Intro
spection, would be a better prepa ration
than a ball ond tho fanfaronade of the
mob. There will be plenty of time dur
ing the four years for the people who
ore exclusively Inclined to visit Wash
ington nnd engage In the social whirl.
Instead of going to all the trouble to
alter the date, In the hoje of thereby
propitiating the weather, why not make,
the Inauguration a quiet nnd bofltttlng
ceremony, and arrange a grand "blow
out," If such needs be, for a later date?
There had been a number of bur
glaries In a certain suburban neighbor
howl, and the conversation at a small
whlr.t party turned naturally enough
on burglars in general and their local
performances In particular. Everybody
had expressed au opinion except a
on let, elderly gentleman, who was ap
parently more Interested In his cards
than hx criminology. P.ut he was int
to be let ott so easily.
"Doesn't It make you nervous,"
somebody usked him, "to think that
every night when you go to lied that
you may be burglarized before morn
ing?" "Oh, we don't mind them," nid too
elderly gentleman, cheerfully, with a
glance across the room at his wife.
"We're too well used to them, aren't
me, Mary?"
"John," said his wife, wartilngly,
"don't be s"Iy."
"Silly!" echoed he, nnd turned to the
others. "Now that's her modesty.
Those burglars have been trying to go
through our house every night for two
weeks. Always get hi through the dining-room
window, too. Hut Mary hears
them. Yes, sir, no sooner do they get
through tho window than Mary hears
'em and wakes me up. Fortunately for
uh, Mary la n very light sleeper."
"Rut It must bo awful to wake up
llko that!" exclaimed one of the listen
ers. "Itather disturbing the tlrst night,''
continued tho speaker. "But not so
bad after one gets used to it. All I
have to do, you know. Is to get un mil
lock -tho bedroom door, and then the
burglars go right back out of the dining-room
window.
"Very methodical they are, too," add
ed the elderly gentleman, thoughtfully,
"for they always lock the window after
them."
COOKING AT SEA.
Kitchen and Provialoa Itooms of
Modern Stramahlp,
With a imputation of more than
4,000 to be cooked for and fed, three,
four and Ave times n day for n week,
and with no butcher, bakery and gro
cery "around tho corner." the culinary
arrangements of a modern Bteamshllp
must, of necessity, bo most complete.
Great cold storage rooms for pcrlsh
abla provisions must be provided as
well as the appliances for cooking nnd
preparing the raw material. The
kitchen nnd provision rooms of tho
Georgo Washington, the newest steam
ship of the North German Lloyd and
the largest German vessel afloat,
which will arrive in New York Juno
20, are of enormous dimensions. The
kitchens of the first and second cab
Ins are near the dining rooms of their
respective classes. In Ihem nro great
steaming, stocks pots, ranges, steam
tattles, and all modern machinery
which can In any way aid tho chefs In
their work.
Many of these devices, such as egg
beaters, potato parors, mincing ma
chine, automatic egg boilers, coffee
mills and dishwashing machine are
worked by electricity.
In addition to the kitchens there are
on board Icehouse for meats, baker
ies, a eonwectlonery room and scul
lery rooms. In all, the kitchen end
provision rooms occupy a space of
47.000 cubic feet.
The ihl stornge and provision
rooms are ho arranged that their con
tents may be readily scut into the
kitchens by electrically operated dumb
waiters.
The greatest attention was giveu ev
ery delull of the provisioning and
kitchen accommodations In order that
the great number of passengers and
crew might bo properly and promptly
fed.
tirttliiyr Nrit,
"What's the matter? Has your hus
band ccmmiI to love you?"
"X no, but he's ivascd to be tired,
when I have hysterb-s." Cleveland
Lender.
A girl with a lot of fellows hanging
around Iter is tho most worthless per
son on earth; both to herself and
family.
No sailor exjieets to hsvo much of
a pull unless be knows the ropea.
5
-.1 i ?';''
. i . ,
s
i r I
( (
VA.. W. ,-i f-il. i .j ;
LATEST ENEMY THAT WARSHIPS MUST FACE,
Kngland Is having all sortf- of military scans. After having the pos
sibility of nn invasion by sea held before the people by their soldier
Idol, Lord Roberts, and others, with nn inadequate homo forv to defend
tho land, cornea the menace of the airship which mny destroy their mighty
worships, and this Is giving Inhabitants of tho "tight little Island" another
tit of fear.
The airship Is :i factor to bo reckoned with at any modern naval con
ference, says a writer In the .Sphere, for since thu exploits of Wright and
Fannan the idea of aerial navies "grappling In the blue" seems to be In a
fair way of realization. Ilefore very long it Is possible that In time of war
the lookouts on board a man-of-war will not only have to "keep their eyes
skinned" for thu first glimpse ot a torjs'do boat or the diminutive periscope
of u submarine, but will also have to direct their attention to the sky
above, Into which ut any moment n hostile uerodroine might sweep up from
the horizon, prepared to drop her deadly cargo of high-explosive bombs
upon the leviathan of the sen. Possibly nt night special men chosen for
their ocutenpss of hearing might be placed aloft at the mastheads as far
as practicable from the noises of the sea and engines to listen for the first
whirr and rattle of nn approaching airship's motors and propellers. Light
guns so mounted us to bo fired almost vertically and provided with speclally
deslgncd projectiles will doubtless form a part of the warship's equipment,
and with their muzzles trained aloft aud their crews sleeping beside the:n
will be ready to Im-IcIi fire and destruction tit the hovering aeroplane, whether
cen coming up by daylight or suddenly discovered by the sweeping beams
of tho soarehlightH. And it Is by no ic.:-ans certain that the battleship
would come off second Is'st. She is built to take punishment which the
aeroplane Is not and (hough she may be badly damaged she may still bring
down her opponent flaming and headlong into the sea.
SOME MAItSIED MEDITATIONS.
By Clarence I. Cullen.
What most women think (hey know:
That men are crazy over widows.
Khe'll laugh gayly with you about
there new cabriolet or peach-basket
hats but she'll sting you for tho price
of cue of them, all tho same.
The modern woman's Idea of nn "al
lowance" for herself is this: All that
Is left of the roll after the rent r.nd
husehold expenses have been paid.
No woman ever becomes bo outlnnd
Ishly fat that she doesn't Imagine that
her husband takes ecstatic delight In
having her plump herself int.3 his tap.
Home women have a sulilclent sen to
of humor to chortle Inwardly wheu
their lovers or husbands synonymous
terms in this enso place them on pe
destals. A woman Imagines thnt she's the
dandy little homemaker all right, all
right, when sho buys her husband a
new green velour Morris chnlr on the
installment plan.
The reason why she reads aloud to
you tho list of the wealthy bride's lin
gerie trouosoau Is to show you whnt a
tightwad you are for not getting her
tho same kind of stuff.
Every woman ought to know that
there are plenty of husbands not ne
cessarily prigs, either who distinctly
dislike to hear their wives tell off-color
Btorles, even if rhey don't say so.
"Trial marriages," that new tlme-will-tell
matrimonial scheme, sounds all
right, but the Idea Is lacking lu novel
ty. Anybody who has tried It knows
that the average marriage Is n trial.
Often, when a woman fondly Imag
ines tlint she Is making a man her slave
with her languishing glances nnd subtle
flattery, his inner self is riotously, rau
cously laughing at her vain Imaginings.
When a man's little old careful'y con
cealed dreams and illusions are nil
warjs'd out of sh.".H through constant
contiguity to (lie selfishness and greisl
of his home, his wife calls him "itil
lous."
A married woman hates to think of
getting to bo 45 years old because she
feels ttuit at that age she'll look middle-aged,
whereas her husband will be
Vist a young fellow nnd still keenly In
the game, looks and nil.
The wife snjs to her women friends,
"ijind sakes alive, I'd hate to have n
man tied to my apron strings," general
ly is the one who lights like n wildcat
when her husband Intimates that he'd
like to carry a latchkey.
W hen a woman's gray hairs can no
longer lie pushed underneath, i imbed
over, or otherwise hidden, sho .'.ays,
uoiK'halaiitly : "Oh. I've been ns gray
as a badger ever since 1 was P a
family trait, you know."
It makes no difference how artfully
ami resolutely she bsl you to the hyme
neal altar, she. Is bound to twist it
around, after a few years, to make It
appear as If you had threatened to
commit suicide If she rojerlcd you.
Although mof-t of the royal princess
es of l: ii rope are taught in their girl
hood how to cook, many a $l.Vn week
young fellow on this wide marries an
American prliuvs whose knowledge of
Cooking If. oonllued exclusively to fudge.
Mum Is such an unreasonable brute
that he's bound to Ist-onic a bit
thoughtful when, upou arriving borne
1 f
4 .K
t
- "'i t i.
S4 e
in the evening, he finds his wife (still
wearing the crumpled kimono he saw
her in at breakfast and her hair yet
nndone) huddled up on the couch "tell
ing her fortune" with a dog's eared
dock of cards.
BOXING FOB SCIENCE.
London Mrillonl Student Demon
strate the Value of Oxruen.
Dr. Leonard Hill's lecture on "The
I'so of Oxygen" the other evening at
the Imdo'i Institution wtia made dou
l.'y intcreMlng by tho introduction of
a real boxing bout, the object being to
prove how valuable oxygen Is In ath
letics. The boxers were both from the Lon
don hospital nnd one was an expert
with the gloves, the other a novice,
says a New York correspondent. Tho
first round, lasting two minutes, was
fought by tho latter wthout oxygen.
The young medicos hit, dodged, feint
ed oud hit again. The novleo banged
out right and left, but could not get
through the expert's guard, while the
latter got many blows home, so that
ho had his opponent panting whaa
"time" was called.
A second round was called after nn
Interval and tho novice started well.
In one minute, however, he was "all
In," while the exiu-rt was hardly dis
tressed. Then, as the novice sat pant
ing, tho bag of oxygen was brought and
the mouthpiece placed between his lips.
The third round was a very brisk
one. The novice actually forced the
pace for a few seconds. When "time"
was called the men were on nn equal
ity as regarded conditions. Tho ex
pert boxer later declared that his oppo
nent hit harder and "stayed" better
nfter taking the oxygen, white the no
vice said that he did not know the
round would end so soon.
Aru'io'n ModeMy.
Arago, the great French scientist,
was never seen with n decoration on
his breast. He valued honors lightly.
Ono evening Lcverrler, the astronomer,
called on him on his way to dine with
a minister. He expressed a wish to
tilcar decorated with an order to
which he was entitled, having received
tho otllclHl notice of the honor, al
though he had not as yet the decora
tion Itself.
"Open that drawer," said Arago,
"and take whatever you want."
In that drawer were nil the crosses
and ribbon which kings and emperors
confer.
While Arago wished alsive every
thing to promulgate science Und to
make his researches useful, be did not
attempt to Identify himself forever
with his discoveries by writing hooks,
lie had no time for writing, but imii
teuted himself with noting the results
of his work in the record of the bureau
of longitude or announcing It verbally
to the academy.
I p to lilm.
"lo you think you con manage with
my salary of a week, darling?" ho
asked after sin- had said yes.
"I'll try, Jack." replied she. "Put
what will yon do';" 1'nlon leader.
We don't know of anything much
faimler than to hear one big fat wo
man refer to another big fat woman
as "til rile."
At what period In life do wurts be
gin ti grow on people's faces? We
never saw u young womau with a wart
on her face.
COSSIP RESrOITSIELE FOP. CHURCH
Uy Rev.
I 71
It Is doubtful if much
church narnial. Those on
that the in"n and women responsible for it ro
not of mm Ii account, anyhow. They are
usually carrion-Ilke In nature and sku-vxs In
prnotn-e. In the past thirty years .' have
known three or four church senmbs, and,
without an exception. It was not so much un
offense that had been commit ted. bat It was
a dfsjiot'iiion on the part of a tew to roll inf'.'i'onccs nnd
suspicions and gossip and '-messes nil togetl ft with per
sonal prejudice or dislike f..r a victim.
There need not be much vandal In nn church, how
ever, If It will do the one thing It. ougM to do to be
worthy of tli respe I and support of the people. It
ought to do as in iif Ti for its in"inbci", nt least, as for
those who are not ni'-mbi rs.
What a pectn'-!e for a church to fairly tumble over
itself trying to tell some man who has been a drunk
aril, thief, liar mil all-around vilhi'.n all his life: "Get
down on your l.i, s, u';ir i.roMie'. nnd hi the minutes
we will nn.k" you white a- snow nnd send you out at a
hundred ('' liars ,i week a an eClmgelisl to convert sin
ners." Liit to a in in or wnmai who for thirty or forty
years who has lived n blanichv'.s life, but who may have
sinned once, it has only tlii to say: "We will pin the
scarlet letter on your bri a.'f. We will wear our shoes
out running fn.in ore It-. :-c ; another to tc'J what we
have heard you have do:.t-. We will demand that you
surrender your license to preach. And we want you to
got right, out of the membership of this church. We
wash our h.ii.ds i leaiof j on. We want nothing to do
with you or any mem'tcr of your family."
Now, I have not a particle of doubt that a church
that will do that, sort of thing is as near tin annex of
hell ns the devil is delighted to have it.
DESTROYING TAITII IN MARRIAGE.
By Joseph GoU Lemen, Jr.
A statistician could produce some startling
figures connecting the growing divorce evil In
Amerlcn with a pernicious kind of snarl flung
Into happy homes by papers whose "home de
partment," supposedly wholesome, is Ailed, like
n leathsome gutter rag, with tho disease
germs of domestic discord.
Young wives, supremely happy in their love
and trust, are sneered ut by misanthropes nnd
nnbo:levers in lb" very institution of matrimony, by
people who ilaunl ingly violate its sacred creed. Wives
urn jested at because of the confidence they have in
their husbr.i.ds. nnd are agitated Into the belief that they
are moral and physical slaves. Tender girls of recent
wedding are 1oid by these gloating
o evil, and are persuaded that
OLD SCKGS ARE BEST.
Old songM are best, whose tender play
Of lilt and codencc, s.ul or gay.
lirings back with sudden loss und pain
Old thought, old lipids, old summer rain
So near, and yet so far away.
Once more the quickened pulses sway
To subtlo things tlnit would not stay.
And murmur like a lost refrain
Old gongs ure best.
The lure of moonlit nights in May,
The light that on far hill-tops lay.
Strange dreams that, thronged an eager
brain.
Lost faces in a iruoslly train,
Wake with forgetful times, and say
Old songs ure best.
National Magazine.
"It's the first time," said Winnie,
letting her eyes droop, "it's the first time
thnt we have been quite alone together
since it happened."
The widower seemed struck by the
circumstance,
"Yes," ho replied consideringly. "I
believe it is I positively believe it is."
"I I hope," she said timidly, "I
hope you've got over It by now?"
The widower reflected.
"I think I have," he answered con
scientiously; "I'm almost pure I have.
You see, I have been trying hard trav
ellng nnd all that sort or tning, you
know. I finished up at Monte Carlo.
The place cheered me wonderfully ; I
lost quite a lot of money at the ta
bios."
"I think that was very wrong of
you," said Winnie, sternly. "Gniublln
Is wicked."
"Ah but if you knew what relief
It was to be able to do something wick
ed again, slgtieil trie widower, "you
would overlook It. Do you know, I was
gradually becoming almost too good
to live. It gave me quite a shock, when
I realized It. My constitution would
not have stood the strain much longer
I am certain."
"The older tneu grow, the worse they
get," declared Winnie, with the air of
one delivering a profound epigram.
"Thnt, of course, is the natural tend
ency." he admitted. "It doesn't do to
check It beyond a certain point." He
sighed again at this sudden eontempla
tlon of man's Innate depravity. "It's
like suppressing measles," he added
little lnconsequently.
Winnie was silent for a moment
Then she looked up suddenly, fixing
her In rue, blue, childish eyes on the
widower's abstracted countenance.
"I can't think," she protested, "what
on earth ever made you marry her.'
The widower withdrew his gar.e slow
lv from vacancy and let It rest on her
face Willi mild wonder.
"You didn't know my wife," he re
marked cryptically.
"I don't see that that would have
helped to explain what made you mar
ry her," persisted Winnie.
"It would have helped immensely,
he corrected. "It would have afforded
a complete ami satisfactory eiphma
tlon, in fact."
Winnie shook her head.
"I don't understand," she admitted
"It has puzzled me evor slni espc
dally us as " She fal
tered and blushed.
"Exactly," said the widower. "Ea
peclully as (hat win the case."
"Don't be absurd'.'' exclaimed Win
Winnia and the Widower J
SCANDALS.
P. E. Ilopkln.
false If he falls to toe the fireside goal at the stroke of
0 each night. They are called "trusting ninnies" If they
allow themselves to be bound down to the Iron-handed
rule of a self-ct ntercd monster, and are urged to "show
him his place."
The t Deet of M reading uism formerly untroubled
minds of joung wives is to create misgivings If not dis
belief In the fidelity of their devoted husbands. Finally
the recalcitrant attitude of the deluded wife in attempt
ing to "show her husband ills place," her Harcnstlc in
sinuations and her assumed Indifference to what sho Im
agines to be the faithlessness of her husband, gradually
tenr away the cords of love, and another divorce re
sults. The dissension thnt U bred in peaceful households by
venom dippul words is not (oi. lined to that stamp of
the sensational newspaper article. Every woman who
has made a botch of her own life, matrimonially, seems
to nurse a grkaucc against all who have attained the
Joy for which her own heart yearns, and she watches fof
opportunities to prejudice and embitter happy young
wives with devolcd husbands. P.etween the disappointed
women who gossip nnd those who write, tho young wifo
has a troublous time of keeping her faith intact. P.ut
many of them, true types of womanhood, heed not tho
magpie's screech and retulu the love of a good man always.
harm Is done by a
the Inside knew
THE CHURCH AND
as well for the good of the state.
I fully ngree with him, und I can understand, too, and
sympathize with the great Catholic leader of France,
the Count de Mun, who recently exclaimed: "In Amer
ica separation means the reign of liberty; 1n Franco
the reign of Impiety." American Catholics rejoice In our
separation of church and state; and I can conceive of
no combination of circumstances likely to arise which
should make a union desirable cither to church or state.
We know the blessings of our present arrangement; it
gives us liberty r.nd binds together priests nnd people in
a union better than that of church and state.
Other countries, other manners; we do not believe
our system adapted to all conditions; we leave U to
church and state in other lands to solve their problems
for th?lr own best Interests. For ourselves, we thank
God we live in America, "in this happy country of ours,"
Iconoclasts that oil
to quote Mr. Kcosevelt, where "religion and liberty ile
every husband Is natural allies."
nie, wrathfully. "All the same, I
should like to know," she added, with
true feminine pertinacity, "what made
you marry her?"
'Shall I tell you?" ho asked, calmly.
'Do, please?" entreated Winnie.
'She did," said the widower.
'She did? What do you mean?"
'I mean thnt she made me marry
her," explained the widower, patiently.
Your wife?" demanded Winnie.
opening wide eyes of amazement upon
him.
"Yes. She was a woman of the most
extraordinary determination. She was
very rich, too." He sighed. "Money is
such a power," he ndded.
'Then," said Winnie, with au air of
stern rebuke, "it was not a love match
at all?'
'Well, perhaps not exactly what you
would describe ns u love match," he
conceded ; "although she pretended to
lie very devoted to me. I may add that
she h"d a rather remarkable way of
showing her devotion at times."
"What sort of a remarkable way?"
inquired Winnie, becoming Interested.
"Did she pet you too much?"
"Hardly too much," replied the wid
ower, reflectively. "You see, the poor
girl had a somewhat fiery temper. She
was terribty Jealous entirely, oh, quite
"WHAT MADE YOU MA11KV HUB?"
entirely without cnuse," he hastened to
add. "Nevertheless, she would uot al
low me on any consideration to speak
to a woman under 45."
"That must have been a great hard
ship," murmured Wiuiue.
"I could have supported It with equa
nlmity," he sighed. "Put she latterly
developed various uncomfortable eccen
tricities. Among other things she be
came a vegeturlun, and compelled me
to live on herbs, like herself. She em
braced the absurd theory that two
meals a day were enough for human
beings to subsist upon, and from that
moment I never knew what It was uot
to feel hungry, it was this practice, 1
lioJleve, that eventually curried her
off,"
"She she was not very young
hazarded Winnie.
"Poor girl no! She she had been, I
believe. But she outgrew It. Sho was
lu her MtU year wheu she expired."
"Sixty-four!" exclaimed Winnie,
"Sixty three," he corrected.
"O tih !" ejaculated Winnie In a
long-drawn gasp. "And you you were
only 25 when you married her!"
" hen she uiMrrled me," the widow
er interposed mildly. "Yes; I couldn't
help that, you know. It was three
yrs ago now, so I became considera
bly older as we went along."
"Sot wax old enough to have been
THE REPUBLIC.
By Cardinal Gibbons.
There Is a union that is inimical to the in
tt rests of religion, nnd consequently to the
state; nnd thero is a separation that Is In
imical to the interests of religion, and conse
quently to tho stale; and there is a separa
tion that is for the best interests of both. In
our country separation is it necessity; and It
is a separation that works for the best inter
ests of religion, as Mr. Tuft recently stated,
North American Peviow,
your grandmother!" exclaimed Winnie
indignantly.
"True; but she would never have
consented to act lu that relation to
wards me though, of course, I should
have preferred it, If it could have been,
arranged." '
"I feel," declared Winnie, severely,
"that we are treating tho subject much
too flippantly."
"You've not been married," he sigh
ed ; "so you don't know."
"That's true." conceded Winnie,
meditatively. "I don't know at leas
not yet "
"There's no reason why yofi
shouldn't," put in the widower, witlji
sudden eagerness.
"Oh, but I am not sure that I want
to," she objected.
"You would then enjoy the advan
tage of being In a isisitlon to provs
your assertion," he urged.
"And, supposing I found when It
was too late that I was wrong?" sh4
demurred.
"You wouldn't," said the widower,
with emphasis. "You would find that
in your case theory and practice
would entirely coincide To begin with,
you are not a vegetarian.''
"But," protested Winnie, "my hus
band might Insist upon making me be
come one."
"I can answer for him,' said the wid
ower, decisively. "Do you know Wh
nle by the way, you don't mind niV
calling you 'Winnie.' do you? 'Winnie
has always struck me ns being the vert
prettiest name n girl could have WIA
nle." "I didn't say you could!" she ex
claimed. ''
"I have a wonderful way of taking
things for granted," explained the wid
ower airily. "But, do you know, it Jus
occurred to me while you were tally
ing and while you were showing tni
what n beautiful thing marriage might
be with a sweet girt' (who wasn't &.
vegetarian) It Just occurred to
that I was most frightfully fond of
you "
"Oh," said Winnie. "There's tho
next dance beginning, and I "
"Never mind the next dance. What
do you think I came here for to-nlghtj
I didn't come to dance. I came to se0
you. I have been waiting to see yoot
for for months; but they told me you
were engaged, and I kept away."
"I I broke It off," she murmured,,
looking down.
"Was he a vegetarian?" asked tha
widower, anxiously.
Winnie raised her eyes to his, and
her cheeks turned suddenly crimson.
"JTo, but I I "
The widower gave a little triumphant
laugh.
"My darling," he whispered in hep
ear, "we can make it up to each othef
nil the rest of our lives!"
'J'be Valuable.
The man w ith a wife and seven chil
dren hauled up in front of the hotel
desk, registered, got his bellboy and.
was starting off when the clerk, think
ing maybe he might Jolly the new ar
rival, called to hhu :
"I beg your pardon," he said, ''but
h-idn't you tietter leave your valuables
In the safe?"
"Do you think I ought to?" Inquired
the raau innocently enough, to he&(
him sr.y it. ,
"Well. It is the best pluu." 1
"Ail right," suld the man, and, turtJ
lng to his wife, "Here, Mary, jmss tli
children over to the gent behl.id Ui4
couutei. He'll look Hfter them
gtvo vs a rest."
Whereupon the clerk apolof brL-H
Jndge.